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Step into the captivating world of "Behind The Scenes," a compelling series crafted by the talented Giuliana Mancini . In this immersive exploration, she delves deep into the lives of fellow actors she encounters while navigating the relentless audition circuit. Experience the raw emotions and untold stories of performers as they share their daily tribulations and triumphs in the pursuit of their dreams. February 28th, 2025   It’s a beautiful Friday morning.  Crisp. Warm.  Deceptive Spring.  I walk into the Equity Building.  It’s 10:44am.  I don’t have a slot. Today’s audition is Forestburgh Playhouse’s EPA for their 2025-2026 season, and Greenbrier Valley Theater’s ECC for their production of Beautiful: The Carole King Musical. I’m planning on just going to Forestburgh Playhouse’s EPA.  I took my time to come in this morning.  Frankly, my body is still recovering from the flu… Like every other person in New York. Sickness seemed to knock out every friend or friend of a friend throughout one point of the month.  I walk up to George.  I think we all know George.  If you don’t, let me describe him for you.  George is tall and calm.  He runs an Equity call with a precision & clarity that’s incredibly impressive, but also soothing, especially considering how chaotic these calls can be.  When I see George at an audition, I feel immediately safe, because I know we’re in good hands. I sign up, number 68 on the Equity Alternates list.  When slots are filled for the day, there’s an Equity Alternate list.  After that, there’s an Equity Membership Candidate list  After that, there’s the Non-Union list.  It’s a lot of people to sort through.  There’s a lot of people on the 16th floor.  It feels like all of those friends or friends of friends that had the flu or Norovirus or COVID or whatever nasty cold was going around rested up and are here today.  I sit down in an area that seems just far enough away from the crowd, and just close enough I can still hear George’s booming voice.  He’s calling from the Alt list… number 23. I know I have time.  I try to see if there’s anyone I could interview.  I look around, and see a bandana covering a head of titian colored hair.  Liz is deeply engrossed in her book, but occasionally looks up and around at her surroundings. Grounded, but attentive.  Gracious, but focused.  I think she’s the right person to talk to. Giuliana: Could you just tell me your name and your pronouns?  Liz: Hey, I’m Liz, she/her  G: Slay. What are you auditioning for today?  L: uh, I did the Beauuuuutiful Greenbrier call this morning, and now I’m waiting for the Forestburgh one.  G: Oh My God, slay. How did that first one go?  L: Honestly, for being 9:30 in the morning, it went, it went alright. A nice warm room, like, they were nice, and yeah.  G: That’s awesome. What time did you get up this morning?  L: I got up at 7. 7am.  G: And what was the situation, did you have a time slot already, what are we working with? L: Okay, so I signed up for the ECC last week, and I knew that I was like 13 online, so I knew I was going to be early. It’s giving Group One.  G: Totally  L: So it’s 7, I wake up, make my little coffee, yada yada, and make my way here. I already had a time slot for Forestburgh, so. I feel like that never happens. Like, never ever. Like, one day, I was number 200, and it’s looking like I might get [a time slot], and then I did.  Quick interjection! For those who may not be aware, when an Equity member signs up for auditions, they do so through an online portal. The portal will open at a certain time, and give its members 15 minutes to join the queue for whatever signups are happening that day. After 15 minutes, the portal will randomly assign those in the queue a number, and once it is your turn in line, then you may select an audition.  What Liz is speaking to is the chaos that has really reigned over this audition season, more so than others I, personally, have experienced. In June of 2021, Actors Equity introduced the Open Access policy, an alternative route to joining the union. Before this policy, it was only possible to join the union through an Equity contract, or gaining Equity “points”, which were granted by however many weeks of work one completed at an Equity theater.  Because the union has allowed an open access policy, many more actors are competing for the same number of union jobs. It’s important to note that a strong union is vital to the success of a workforce. I, personally, am the daughter of a labor lawyer, and deeply value the power of unions. However, it is clear from going to the calls how tempting it has become to simply join for the benefit of being seen.  Who can blame a young actor, if they believe in their talent, feel ready to join, or are, quite frankly, just sick of the unsafe conditions that come with signing up for a call? Waking up at all hours of the morning, to sign your name on a list, if not at the Equity Building, skipping a day of work, only for the slim chance to be seen? Who can blame the actors who were granted entry through their EMC points, or an Equity contract, rightfully frustrated about the policy crowding an already packed room? Who can blame the union, who, like the industry at large, is trying to stay afloat financially, after two years of making no income thanks to the big "You Know What?"  .  .  .  I digress. G: Literally Blessed.  L: Few and far between, to be honest.  G: A win is a win.  L: We take them where we can get them, let me tell ya.  G: What do you do besides acting to like… earn money?  L: Sure.  G: I don’t like the term day job because like… rich people have multiple jobs. Do you know what I mean? Anyways. What are your other income slays?  L: Income slays include the classic caterer actor trope, which… honestly I thought was going to be dead for the first couple of months of the year. But it has been rather fruitful so far, so that is what’s paying the rent bills. And also, dog walking here and there, babysitting here and there, I also sub dance classes for different friends at different theaters north of the city. Really just gig based things, because especially right now, I want to keep most of the day open to do things like this. The other job. The auditioning job.  G: The job that we’re not paid for yet.  L: Exactly.  G: How long have you lived in New York for?  L: Today marks four years. Literally today!  G: wooooooooooooooow.  L: I know. I moved in February of 2021.  G: How are you feeling about New York so far?  There’s a pungent pause. Liz makes a face.  Kind of like a Sourpatch Kid; first it’s sour, then it’s sweet.  G: for sure for sure for sure.  L: Pungent Pause.  I love New York. I see myself living here indefinitely. I have really fallen in love with my apartment, and I think that has changed my life. I think it’s just the first home that I’ve had outside of my parents home. I went to college and did that whole thing. But that was, you know, fake independence to me. It was just like, I’m still in school, I have very regimented things set up for me. But then, moving here, I was able to choose my space, create my space, choose the people I wanted to live with and really curate that for myself. And that is the best thing about coming home now, like, this is where I call home. My parents moved out of my childhood home, and so that ‘home’ so to speak is gone, that I spent 20 years in. So I have a deep love for New York, and this is where most of my friends are.  G: But can I ask about that pungent pause? Because that pause was telling. I think…  and I don’t know if you agree with this because we just met, quite literally, a couple of minutes ago, but living in New York is really hard. And it’s really hard for a lot of different reasons, it’s just a really harsh place to live. It’s constant, and it’s extremely demanding and extremely excruciating at points, and there’s a reason why people are not affected when they see a girl sobbing on the subway. It’s because that’s just -  L: You’re completely desensitized - G: Totally.  L: to SO much. And I really recognize that. Especially when I go back to my parents and I’m like, telling stories of things that happen in the city and my parents are like clutching their pearls they’re like, “What? What do you mean?”  G: Yeah.  L: That’s just, that’s just a regular day on the subway. And, remembering the humanity around us, and trying to connect with my humanity even as I see people is like…  Liz takes a deep breath.  L: It’s sad to get so desensitized. I don’t know if I’ve met someone like this who has lived in New York that hasn’t been. Because it’s constantly around us, and we too have to move forward in this city  G: And Survive.  L: And Survive! And everyone’s on a different hustle, right? A hustle to make rent, a hustle to get this job, like, that aspect, that kind of tension in this city, I feel from everyone.  G: Yeah, you could go on the subway, and you’re sitting next to, like, people that want to be the best in whatever field they’re in. And that’s really motivating and that’s really amazing. But it’s also a lot of pressure. Kind of constantly. Especially when you’re just like, “I just want my mom !” L: I know!!!!! And you’re just living day to day. I actually am so sorry, I have to go sign in for this.  G: oh my god, go go go!  Liz runs over to George and checks in for her audition.  G: Okay and we’re baaaaaaaack!  L: We’re back!  G: Because you are checked in, I want to respect your time, so I’ll only ask you one more question. What is the best and hardest part of all of this?  L: The hardest part is finding the drive each day. And it can be day to day. I think, choosing to show up when you don’t feel like you’re gonna give 115%, I think that there’s so much more power in just showing up, and being like, “Hey, this is me today”.  G: Yeah.  L: Because this is an industry where you’re supposed to be showing life on stage, I’m gonna show you my life in real time. And if I can’t drop into this song the same way, hopefully there’s humanity behind the table as well and they can see that in me. The hardest part is definitely showing up. The early morning, the burnout, and just like the… me thinking of all the things that are horrible first.  The waiting between doing the thing that you actually want to do, and missing that, and not feeling like you’re filling your cup in that way. But, I’d say, the best thing is finding the community. Like I love this, that we just got to sit down, and are like, “Hey we’re two actors doing this, going through the same thing”. I have met my literal best friends, either in school for this, or on contracts, or what have you, and they are the people that keep me going. I find that everyday I can talk to like minded people who are going through the same thing and we can kind of sit and share in our struggles and successes. G: Love that! Well, thank you so much for your time. Is there a place where folks can find you, via Instagram or a website, all that sexy stuff?  L: Sure! On Instagram, it’s @lizzdavviss. And my website is www.lizdavisnyc.com . G: Amazing. Thank you so much. Break legs!

Step into the captivating world of "Behind The Scenes," a compelling series crafted by the talented Giuliana Mancini . In this immersive exploration, she delves deep into the lives of fellow actors she encounters while navigating the relentless audition circuit. Experience the raw emotions and untold stories of performers as they share their daily tribulations and triumphs in the pursuit of their dreams. Friday, January 17th.  It’s freezing outside.  8:40am.  I get on the train, heading to Irish Rep.  I’m interviewing AND auditioning today.  It’s 23 degrees outside.  I’m repeating my monologue to myself, constantly, as I nervously tend to do before auditions. This show in particular, Irishtown, requires authentic Irish dialects. As I walk on 22nd street, I can see my breath as I practice the perfect vowel shapes and try to match the patter of my speech to the patter of my feet.  It’s 9:15am.  I join the line outside of Irish Rep.  I don’t have to sign up on the list, because I am in the union & have a pre-registered time slot.  Often times, for those who may not be aware, at auditions, those who are not in the union, “non-equity”, will put up an un-official list outside of the audition location, before the official audition monitor arrives.  Sometimes they take the list, sometimes they don’t. Because it’s a crapshoot, that’s why non-eq folks will often get up early on audition days, and wait outside. On a day like today, the elements are brutal.  It’s the coldest January in 13 years in New York.  I can’t help but think about the current events of the past week;  California friends’ posts & news articles I’ve seen. People losing their homes. Fire engulfed the lives of people on one coast. And on the other, it feels like we’re actually freezing over.  We could be anywhere but here on a Friday morning, and yet, this is where we are.  I’m looking for the right person to approach.  I, like last time, am nervous again.   Truthfully, I’ve attempted to attend auditions for interviews, or tried to interview friends at auditions that haven’t panned out exactly the way I’ve wanted.  Trying to connect with others, especially before I’ve finished my first cup of coffee in the morning, feels like a behemoth of a task. Have I come too early? Is everyone looking at me weird? Is my foundation rubbing off on my coat?  And finally, I see a dark curly head of hair that seems to glow.  I can’t even see her face, but I gravitate towards her.  She has an aura that feels like a wood burning stove, & on a day that’s this frigid, you can’t help but move towards her. I introduce myself, & we begin our interview.  G: Testing, 1,2,3, perfect. If you just want to say your name… pronouns, where you’re from.  Any fun facts about yourself.  D: Cool. Oh my gosh. Pressure. My name’s Dani, or Danielle Connor . Whichever one you prefer, depends on the day. She, her, hers are my pronouns. I’m from Ireland, so that’s a big reason why I’m coming here to audition for Irishtown G: What county, what town, come on.  D: Oh my goodness, all the details! So, I’m from Dublin. It’s this little town called Blackrock. It’s really close, right by the water and everything. I was actually just home for the holidays, too, so I’m just back last week. Back into the cold. Back into the job  G: I love that. That’s stunning. How long have you been in New York for? D: I’ve been here for three years now. I graduated from my undergrad back home, and then moved here to study acting, like most people in New York  G: Wow.  D: Yeah, I’m lucky though, I’m a dual citizen. My mom’s American. So, that has made life… SO much easier. Yeah, no visa processes, thankfully, so that’s one little thing I don’t have to worry about.  G: Thank god.  D: I know.  G: We’re so happy to have you.  D: Thank you!  G: How long have you been auditioning for?  D: Pretty much since I graduated. So I graduated about a year ago. I went to Stella Adler & they were big on sort of like, “Don’t audition while you’re here. This is your time to fail, and fail better” and all that sort of stuff. So, I focused on that while I was there until I got out. & I’ve been auditioning ever since. & I’ve been working pretty well, which is good.  G: Hell Fucking Yeah.  D: Yeah, it’s been good! But the Irish Rep is like, I mean, it’s always been a dream. It’s kind of, basically, Ireland in America, which is why I’m here, so it just, it works. G: Hell Fucking Yeah. You can curse, by the way.  D: Oh good!!  We belly laugh on the street, a welcome reprieve from the harsh reality of the climate.  D: You never know with these things. But you’re telling an Irishman to curse, so don’t you worry. We’ll be effin’ & blimin’ the whole way.  G: Perfect. I love it I love it. One of my favorite questions to ask, well, it’s a dual question, is what’s the best part of all of this and what’s the hardest part?  D: Ya, that’s a good question.  G: And you can take your time. Big thoughts.  D: I feel like they almost go hand in hand a little bit. Like, I’m starting to love the uncertainty of this. I also hate it at the same time, if that makes any sense. The best thing about it is like, I wouldn’t be doing this if there was anything else that filled me with this type of joy and fulfillment, you know what I mean? G: Ya, I Do Know What You Mean  D: Like, we’re not standing out in the freezing cold, on a Friday morning, just for the fun of it, you know?  G: Totally.  D: So I think that uncertainty and not knowing where the day is going to take you has been a lot of fun, and being comfortable with the uncomfortable. I’m a bit of a perfectionist, and starting to learn that life’s not perfect, so why should we be trying to be perfect when we act, at the same time, d’ya know? And meeting people, like it’s so cool, and in New York City as well. I’ve been so lucky to meet people from all over the world & learn through them, which has been amazing.  I mean the hardest part is also the uncertainty. D’ya know what I mean? We were talking about this the other day, I live with three of my closest friends, & three of us are all actors, & obviously we have these deep, in depth conversations. And a big one is, you finish a gig, and unlike any other career or job, you’re back to starting from zero. And that’s hard. Even taking a break from things, you can be like, “ Fuck, what am I missing? ” You feel like you constantly need to be going. But, trying to reckon with the fact that you also need to be living your life. Because, that’s what we’re doing, we’re emulating life, so you’ve got to live it.  G: Very Stella Adler of you.  D: YES!  G: Veeeeeeeeeery Stella Adler of you.  D: I learned from the best!  G: No, but it’s so true. Because, I feel like I get the question, “ Well, what’s next? ” all the time. And I’m like… D: Fuck knows. Fuck knows! And sometimes that can be a freeing phrase and sentiment as well! G: But sometimes it’s like, really terrifying & youre like  kgvoijaaoawnoigao. D: Totally!  G: Who are you when you’re not acting, or working? What do you like outside of this? D: oooo.  I feel like, in another life, or in this life as well, I just want to be that person, living in a cottage in the woods, with like, a moving body of water close to me, just like growing shit and reading my books, and baking fresh made bread every day. Like, if you have that image in your mind, which is interesting because I live in New York City. G: You are also Irish!  D: I’m Irish! That’s the thing! It’s like, how do these all work together? But somehow… Yeah, I think I really love to learn. I love like, trying new shit, and realizing I can do stuff that I never thought I’d be able to do. Like, I’m slowly but surely getting rid of my gym anxiety and that’s been a lot of fun. Cause, I wanna look like, my dream is Linda Hamilton in Terminator. When she does the pull ups in the beginning of the movie, that’s my dream. That’s what I want to be in my life.  G: I love that.  D: So I’m starting to gain that confidence and shit, and try new stuff, and I also love to read.  G: Can you tell us what you’re reading today?  D: So this is called Blue Sisters.  She reveals the baby blue cover that she’s been clutching onto this whole time.  G: Oh my gosh.  D: It’s by Coco Mellors. I read her other book, Frankenstein and Cleopatra, & it was so good. My best friend Ellie, back home, told me to read this.  G: Shoutout Ellie.  D: Shoutout Ellie. I started this morning. And no spoilers, because this is the first page, but, it’s about sisters and one of them has died.  I gasp.  D: So I texted her and was like, “ what have you begun? what have you started? am i gonna be crying on the subway later on today? ”  G: craaaaaaaaaazy. D: But, so far so good, so if anyone wants a little escapism.  ‘Blue Sisters’  by Coco Mellors is a fun one.  G: I love that. It’s currently so fucking cold, and I think we can go inside. But, before we end, is there any place people can find you?  D: Honestly, I’m a little bit of a hermit, and my Instagram is full of pictures of my dog. So, not currently. But maybe, hopefully, one day, we’ll be in Irish Rep together, and they see my face there.  G: Perfect. Thank you so much for your time today.  D: Yeah, of course.  G: I have to run my Irish dialect by you.  D: Of course!  I enter in the building with Danielle. As I feel blood returning to my extremities, I turn round the corner and see a familiar head of blonde hair.  Sophie Kelly-Hedrik , a former classmate of mine.  She’s cheeky, with a clarity and focus, especially when she’s discussing her work. I ask to interview her, & she obliges.   G: Can you just say that one more time?  SKH: I’ve just gotta keep it brief.  G: No, the part about me being pretty.  SKH: OH! You’re gorgeous! It’s true! You heard it here first!  G: Can you just state your name, and your pronouns, please.  SKH: My name is Sophie Kelly-Hedrik, and my pronouns are she/her/hers. G: Perfect. And we do know each other, don’t we?  SKH: Yes, we do know each other. We went to school together. !!!   G: Um, what time did you get up this morning?  SKH: Today, I got up at 7:15.  G: Nice. When did you first decide to become a performer? Like what was that process/decision making like?  SKH: Like, professionally?  G: When you in your mind were like, “ I’m gonna be that girl. I’m gonna be on stage. ” SKH: Ohhh okay. I was in fourth grade. No, I was in third grade. And I went to see my best friend at the time, who’s name was Sophia. It was Sophie and Sophia, which was cute.  G: Shoutout. SKH: She was in a production of Mr. Popper’s Penguins. And she was the smallest penguin. And I remember going to see her, & I was like, that looks so fun. I want to do that. I think that’s what it was, seeing someone I know be on stage. G: And you were like, “ Why not me ?”  SKH: Yeah.  G: That’s so cool. How long have you been auditioning, professionally?  SKH: I’ve been auditioning professionally since 2017.  G: Period.  SKH: Yes. High School  G: Good for you. What’s been the most surprising part about the industry that you’ve encountered? SKH: Well, I think there’s a big misconception that acting is super cutthroat and selfish. And I don’t think that’s true, at all. I think actors try and really lift each other up. And support each other. Like, this is a great example. What you’re doing is a great example of creating space and community and resources.  G: That’s so nice.  SKH: And once you get to a certain level and you’re going in for jobs, you’re going against friends, right?  G: Totally.  SKH: And you don’t do that because you hate your friends. You love your friends, and you’re all working together, and lifting each other up is one of the best things we can do. G: Oh my god, you’re so sweetie pie. That was such a good answer, I’m gonna cry. What’s your favorite thing that you’ve seen lately?  SKH: Oh, well, we’re in the theater. I recently saw my friend Ayanna Berkman, in The Beacon, here at Irish Rep, right on that stage in front of us. So, that was really, really enjoyable. And the second shout out would be I saw a play called Primary Trust at Seattle Rep, which was really good. That was like, the best play I’ve seen in a while. I was sobbing. I think it’s very poignant, a really great play.  G: How do you approach the craft of acting versus the job of auditioning? And you can take your time on this one, I know it’s a big thinker.  SKH: I think they’re somewhat similar, right? To audition, is to act, right? I think I have a similar process, & I think it depends on the kind of audition. Theater auditions, like EPA’s for example, you’re often doing monologues you know really well, monologues you’ve done before, right? So that process is a bit shorter, because it’s not something you’re unfamiliar with. As opposed to film, tv, and some theater auditions, where you get sides, for example, that is gonna be a little bit different. I think something I’m focused on right now is being a little bit less precious about auditions, because we do so many auditions that you can’t really nitpick, there’s no time for that and frankly it’s not super healthy. So I think learning when to step away is important and when I’m acting in a show or a prolonged process, I don’t step away when I’m frustrated or want to nitpick, I want to lean in to that.  G: So wise. Wicked smaht, look at you! Last question; what does living your dream, honestly look like for you? SKH: That’s such a good question!!!  G: Thanks !  SKH: I think…  She pauses for a moment, long enough for a technician to punctuate the air with, “Well me f*ckin’ too, Keara”.  We giggle and she returns to her thoughts.  SKH: I think it’s about, telling stories. That’s very vague, but, I think that’s really important. Storytelling is like my main drive, so it’s like telling important stories, and working with people you admire are things I go after really hard. And I think, living the dream is like, challenging myself daily. That’s part of living the dream. G: Wow.  SKH: It’s like, really working for something. I think it’s also being proud of where you’ve come and what you’ve done, and what you’ve worked through, that’s living the dream. And I think it’s about seeing art. I think that’s a real joy and gift. So being able to do that, more and more, is the dream.  G: Slay, Sophie Kelly-Hedrik. If folks want to find you in any way shape or form, do you have anything you want to share.  SKH: Yeah, I mean I have a website. https://www.sophiekelly-hedrick.com/  I also have an instagram   @sophiekellyhedrik . I was saying earlier, I don’t have the Instagram app on my phone right now, but I am checking on Safari. So… don’t be afraid.  G: And that’s bravery. Sophie Kelly-Hendrik, thanks so much for your time. SKH: Thank you.   Sophie goes into her audition. I check the time.  It’s 9:58 am.  “ Excuse me? Do you see any headphones ?” A sheepish voice asks. I turn around, and see Lizzy, looking for her headphones in the house seats of the Irish Rep, the actors' makeshift holding room. I immediately get out my phone flashlight, and help her, eventually finding her other headphone. Once finished, I realize she may be a perfect person to talk to. There’s something amiable about her nature; that even if I didn’t just help her, she would be happy to help me.   G: Ok, do you want to just state what your name is, and your pronouns if you feel comfortable.  L: I’m Lizzy, Lizzy Ryland , and my pronouns are she/her. We’re both in black turtlenecks, we got the memo.  G: We did, we did! What time did you get up this morning?  L: I woke up at 7, & I got out of bed at 7:40.  G: Are you in the union?  L: No.  G: So you’re a non-eq king?  L: Yes.  G: Love, love, love. How was the process this morning, as a non-union person, compared to other mornings [auditioning as a non-union person]?  L: I haven’t really done, besides one, trying to go to auditions as a non-union person, so I hedged my bets on a theater company that looked awesome but also doing plays, smaller, rather than doing the Ripley-Grier studio sign-up thing.  G: Oh my god, so have long have you been professionally auditioning for? L: That’s a good question. I’ve been doing theater since I was like, baby. G: Totally.  L: And I am pursuing a dual career in music, writing for theater, musical theater composition and acting. So I’ve been doing auditions this year and last year. G: That’s so sick, I love that. New work is one of my favorite things. L: It’s the best.  G: I can’t wait to ask you all about this new work. What’s been the most surprising part about the industry that you’ve found? L: I’m kind of shy. So I get worried about going to a bunch of auditions and getting rejected a lot. But, every time I’ve shot my shot, the success rate has been pretty high for me. So I feel really lifted up and proud of myself for just being brave and I think I overtrain and don’t go out as much. But the industry has felt like if you do the work, it’ll give the love back to you.  G: That’s gonna make me cry.  L: We’ll see how this season goes.  G: We’ll see, but that’s really inspiring though. Can you tell me a little bit about the work that you like to make, in terms of composing? L: I’m really inspired by Golden Age musical theater. Rodgers & Hammerstein. HammerStein? HammerSteen? Who knows?  G: Certainly not me.  My apologies to however many of you are screaming at your phone the correct pronunciation of that gentleman’s name.  But… we can’t hear you.  I promise I’ll figure it out soon. <3  L: There’s a right way to say it, someone out there knows. And Gershwin. Irving Berlin. Those melodies are incredible to me. I have a huge Golden Age influence. Lots of jazz going on. I went to music school for the last two years, jazz studies as my minor. G: Hell yeah. And where’d you go to school?  L: I went to USC, in Los Angeles.  G: Nice, are you originally from LA?  L: I’m from Colorado. And that’s what my first project is called, Colorado Girl. It’s about when you’re feeling really stuck as an artist, going back home, and reviving the energy and spirit that made you decide to be an artist.  G: I’m gonna cry!  L: Also like, I would say a huge reason I want to write is because I want to have fun songs to sing, and I want to give fun songs to sing to my friends. Because if I see another stupid song about a boy, I’m gonna throw up. I don’t care. I ! Don’t ! Care ! G: Yeah. Give queer people beautiful Golden Age songs. Give us something to sing about besides men.  L: Yeah, and there’s so much out there besides romance. There’s so much more that we go through and struggle with. Everybody. But for me, personally, I want that to be a through line, like how do we find ourselves and what do we go through and struggle with. That’s what I want to see onstage. I love talking about this. I’ll talk about it all day long.  You’re like, “ Can I interview you? ” and I’m like “ Thought you’d never ask !” G: Amazing, amazing. What does living your dream, honestly, look like for you?  L: Honestly, being able to work on my own shit with my friends.  G: That sounds perfect.  L: And new friends too. Meeting people along the way that I can really connect with, because it’s hard to connect to people now. Phones, damn phones. Like I just want to be around people all of the time.  G: Yeah, especially in New York. And maybe I’m alone in this, but I think New York is one of the easiest places to feel really lonely. Because there’s so many people, but you’re in your apartment and you almost feel crammed in, and you don’t want to reach out. It’s so big, and that makes it even more lonely because, you’re like, oh my gosh, there are all of these people and I don’t have anyone to talk to.  L: FOMO. Extreme Weird FOMO  G: I think it’s just a difficult part of learning to be an adult, and growing up in New York. Not even growing up, like being born here, but growing into an adult here. Growing into yourself.  L: That’s another, I guess, lesson, that’s going to be in the musical I’m writing. Ultimately, you do have to go through the journey by yourself and figure out what works for you. It’s kind of lonely, or you can choose for it to be this wonderful experience. But knowing that everybody has to go through it, alone, makes it a little less lonely. Makes sense?  G: It does. Thank you so much for your time, I really appreciate it. Is there any place folks can find you?  L: Yeah! I’m gonna be starting a new Instagram soon, with my artsy name, just Lizzy. But, my full name is Lizzy Ryland, Lizzy with a ‘y’, and I’m on Instagram  and soon I’m launching a YouTube series, vlogging finishing this musical that I’m writing. G: So dope. Lizzy, thank you so much for your time, it’s really appreciated.  L: Thank you!   Realizing I’ve talked to three women around my age, I scanned the house seats to see if there was someone I could talk to a bit different from myself.  I see Adam.  Adam’s tall, with a gentleness surrounding him.  I approach him, and he has a lot of questions for me.  Which, frankly, I respect.  As we talk further, I can see his caution subside, and what emerges is a person clearly committed to his craft.  G: If you could just state your name and pronouns if you’d like, for the class. That’d be great.  A: Hi, my name is Adam Griffith, and I use he/him pronouns.  G: Fantastic. What time did you wake up this morning?  A: Oh, jeez. Not too early. Like… 8:20.  G: Love that. Did you have a time slot walking today? Are you non-union, EMC, Equity, what’s the deal? A: I am equity. But I didn’t have a slot. I had seen this audition posting, I don’t know, a couple weeks ago, and it filled up very very quick, so I just figured I could walk in and get an appointment, some time today.  G: Of course. And how long have you been professionally auditioning for? A: Oh jeez. It’s gonna give my age away, isn’t it? I’m gonna say… 10 years? 12? G: Listen, you could be a child actor, I don’t know.  A: 12.  G: 12 years. As a child actor. Very impressive. When did you decide that you were going to be a performer?  A: I think it happened in high school, because I had done school plays in elementary school and middle school. And then I had auditioned for something in high school, freshman year, and didn’t get it, and was like, “That’s okay, I have different interests, I’ll do sports”. And then over the summer between sophomore and junior year, I did a production of Jekyll & Hyde, the musical.  G: Love.  A: And you know, you’re like, 16, and you wanna feel and be moody. G: It’s so moody!  A: So moody.  SO moody. Death and blood and love, right? And so that’s when I was like “ Oh, no no no, I’m into this, I want to study this. ”  G: Jekyll & Hyde is such a good answer. You talked about studying, so, how do you approach the studying of your craft versus the job of an audition, for something like today?  A: I mean God, I could talk about that for hours. Auditioning is a completely different skill. And it took me a long, long time to feel comfortable doing that. The approach is mostly like, getting off book as best you can, as you should be, & then, allow yourself to play and move, because you won’t be able to control how you’re feeling that day. Even if you’ve rehearsed this and this and this, don’t get married to what you rehearsed. Let whatever’s happening in that moment happen.  And as far as acting in general, I’m like, forever a student. It’s never this or that. This isn’t the one approach for this thing. Ideally, you do a whole bunch of kind of different work, in your time. Don’t get locked into anything; I guess that applies to both. G: I hear you on that.   I’m reminded of earlier, when Sophie gave a completely different answer This is why I love talking to actors. The destination, usually, is always the same, but the roads we all take to it are incredibly different.  We can learn so much when we take the time to listen to one another. G: What’s your favorite thing that you’ve seen lately? Something you’ve seen that you’re like, I’ve got to talk about this.  A: Oh, jeez. I mean I was in San Francisco for a time, and I saw a production, it was a new work, it was called “ My Home on the Moon ”, and it really brought me back to like, the theatrics of theater. It wasn’t just a screenplay on stage, you know what I mean? It had that, it had the family element, and normal, everyday circumstances, but then, there was like, dream sequences, and there was a puppet, that was a noodle. It was set in a pho shop. It was lit well, and it was just… kind of magical.  To go back to the Jekyll & Hyde thing, I feel like, when you’re young, you always want things to be heavy and real and crying and this and this and this, but it’s nice to see things like that play, or even like, Wicked the Movie. Which is so fun. It can be fun, and positive. It doesn’t have to be so doom and gloom, because everything’s so doom and gloom anyway.  G: Yeah, you don’t have to suffer for your art. Which is… it’s supposed to be fun.  I’ve been seeing a lot of David Lynch quotes recently, which, RIP to a legend. But so much of what I’ve been seeing from him and his legacy, is how art is supposed to be fun. Like we’re supposed to be doing this because we enjoy it. And even the moments of dark and gloom and whatever can be fun. What is the best part of all of this and the hardest part of all of this? A: I think it’s the same thing. The variety of the life. You might have this job, or this job. You might be in this city, or this city. And that is so fun. To have that “ I don’t know what’s going to happen next! ” But you also don’t know what’s going to happen next. So if you’re looking for comfort and consistency, this really isn’t the line of work.  It’s feast and famine, you gotta embrace those changes. We have very high highs and very low lows. And that’s the best and worst thing.  G: I hear you on that. Thank you so much for your time. I really really appreciate it. Is there any place we can find you, anything you’re working on that you’d like to share with the class?  A: Sure, my Instagram is @ adamlukegriffith And I’m about to start a new, immersive production with some of my colleagues from Sleep No More. I’m very excited about it, it should be intense and fun and wacky. It’s called Death of Rasputin, by Artemis is Burning.  G: Thank you again so much for your time.  It’s 10:50. My slot isn’t for a while, so I go back to my morning state, practicing the perfect way to say “ I ”, wishing Danielle was there to run it by her.  I’m feeling much calmer than I was this morning, and reminded how necessary moments of joy and art and connection are, especially in the devastation of destruction & uncertainty. It’s a lesson I continue to learn, and muse on, until, finally, my name is called.

Written by Olivia Mathis As audition season is in full swing, it is more vital than ever to keep organized as an actor. When you’re worried about scheduling appointment slots, which self-tapes are due next, or what song to sing at your next appointment slot, it is easy to get scattered. These organizational tips are here to make sure that you can prepare for your next audition and focus on your performance without getting overwhelmed. Keep an audition journal This is one of my favorite tips for people attending lots of auditions. Keeping an audition journal accomplishes two main things: it allows you to note exactly what you’ve been seen for and helps you recall what happened in the room. Write down the project, who was in the room, and what materials you performed. You can also note if they said anything to you, how you felt you did, and any other emotions that came up on the day of your audition. Organizationally, this is great because when you go in for so many projects, it can be difficult to remember who you’ve met behind the table. Keeping an audition journal is also more than an organizational tip. On an emotional level, it allows you to go into the room, write down everything that happened, and then you can let it go and enjoy the rest of your day. I find that no matter how I did at an audition, once I leave, my mind tends to race, and deciding to write down how I did, how it felt, and everything people said allows me to let it go once I’m heading back home. Catalog your sheet music and materials This might seem extreme from an outside perspective, but I didn’t know I needed this until after I did it. If you find yourself, as I did, with folders and folders of sheet music stuffed in a random drawer, I would highly recommend making a catalog of your sheet music and audition materials. First, organize your materials in a way that makes sense for you. Once you’ve done that, make a “database” (I did mine on Google Sheets) of what the song/side/monologue is called, who wrote it or what show it’s from, and where you have it stored. You can do this with your electronic copies as well, by listing a link under “where it’s stored”. I can’t tell you how many random copies of the same song I have printed out over the years, and it helped me rediscover songs that I used to sing that I might want to bring back into my audition book. Taking the time to do this was tedious, but I already feel so much more confident in my ability to find sheet music that I need for the future. Keep separate books While you’re actively auditioning, it’s worth owning multiple books of sheet music. For example, I have two binders: one for my go-to audition pieces and one for songs that I’m actively learning or working on in classes and lessons. Organizationally, this helps you compartmentalize which songs are ready to go in the room and which ones need some work. Not only that, but if you’re ever in the position where you’re in the room, and the creative team wants to hear another song from you, sometimes they will just ask to see your book. This is a rare occurrence, but if you ever find yourself in that situation, you want to be sure that every single song in your audition book is something you’re comfortable singing at any time. Organize your notes  Similarly, keep separate notebooks for class, audition notes, and rehearsals. I find that this helps me find specific notes easier. For example, if I get a really helpful tip from a teacher and I put it in my class notebook, it makes it so much easier to find that note when I need to remember the details. If what you’re looking for is in one big notebook full of rehearsal notes and audition journaling, you have to sift through all of that just to find what I’m looking for. Plus, this gives you an excuse to buy multiple cute journals. It’s a win-win. Log your online submissions Making a log of which self-tapes, emails, and headshot drop-offs I’ve sent online is one of the most beneficial organizational habits I’ve stuck to as a performer. It can be challenging to remember what companies I submitted my information to last month, much less last year, so keeping track has proven to be crucial. Not only is it helpful to track how many times you’ve submitted to a certain company, but you can also log which theatres have called you back in the past, and it helps you recall what materials you’ve already sent them. In the frenzy of audition season, this has been extremely helpful to me, as I have almost emailed the same company multiple times! The only thing stopping me was double-checking my submission log. Figure out your scheduling tactics Whether it’s a physical planner, Google Calendar, or a reminders or notes app, finding a scheduling tactic that works for you is vital. Managing your time can be brutal. Between self-tape deadlines, rehearsal schedules, important open call days, and appointment slots, you must find a system that works for you to organize it all. I’ve tried out all of these methods, and each has pros and cons. Google Calendar is great, because most times that I book a voice lesson or secure an appointment, it will automatically add it to my calendar. Not only that, but it’s great to get a full picture of what your day, week, and even month overview is. I loved using this alongside my notes app (for smaller to-do list items). Although I loved using this, I wanted to steer away from having to look at my phone for my schedule. I recently started a physical planner, and I love it. It’s simple, and whenever I plan something, I get to whip out my cute planner and gel pens. Audition season can be brutal, but it doesn’t have to be overwhelming organizationally. By utilizing these tips, you’ll know what tasks to focus on next, and you can be prepared for anything.

Written by Olivia Mathis As a performer, having an agent or a manager can be extremely beneficial. It is validating to know that you aren’t alone when you’re deep in the audition season. It’s vital to note that if you are actively seeking representation, there are plenty of ways to put yourself out there. You can perform in showcases where agents are present, submit virtually, mail in your headshot and resume, and invite agencies and managers to upcoming cabarets and shows. These are all great ways to get your foot in the door, but what do you do while you await their response? You can’t put your career on hold until you have representation. So how do you navigate being your only advocate as a performer? As you dive into self-representing as an actor, here are some tips to help you along the way. Understand the Job Description of a Manager and an Agent Before you start self-representing, it’s important to understand the difference between an agent and a manager. They fulfill different roles in helping you with your career, and to “play this part” yourself, you need to understand what they do. An agent’s job is to help you get work. They submit you for roles you’re right for, and when you go in for auditions on your own, they can help recommend you to the creative team. They can also negotiate your contract once you land a role. Managers help with branding, career guidance, and networking. They help you to market yourself as an actor. Having an agent or a manager who is well-known and has a good reputation can also help with your credibility as a performer, and it might make casting agencies excited to see what you bring to the table. Understand Your Type as an Actor Whenever you sign with representation, one of the first things they make themselves well-versed on is what roles you’re currently right for. Many factors go into this, including your age, height, demeanor, and skill sets. This seems simple, but it can be difficult to know your type, as it doesn’t always line up with who you actually are. I’ve met so many villain types who are actually the sweetest people in real life! My biggest recommendation for people who don’t know their type is to ask their mentors and friends. This is a great way to get an honest answer without your own opinions creeping in. Once you understand how people perceive you, you’ll know what roles you should be going for right now, and you can keep certain shows on your radar when searching for auditions. Get Used to Self Submitting While having an agent to get you self-tapes and appointments is helpful, it isn’t the only way to get seen. Use sites such as Actors Access, Backstage, and Playbill to find your auditions! It takes a lot of time and hard work, but even taking ten minutes of your day to look through auditions you’re right for will be a huge benefit. This is a great way to get a better understanding of which companies and theatres you want to work with as well. When you get into the habit of being your own agent, your hard work pays off. Even if you have representation, you should still seek out auditions on your own. Go out and try to get seen for the shows you’re interested in! Go to Open Calls/EPAs/ECCs While an agent can help you get appointments for upcoming projects, it's a great idea to attend open calls, EPAs, and ECCs, whether or not you have representation. There is no doubt that going to these can be tough. You often have to wake up extremely early, and there is never a guarantee that you’ll get seen. But if you can carve out time to go, even if it’s only a couple of times a month, it’s a great way to connect with casting directors, creative teams, your actor friends, and even other performers in the holding room. Regardless of what jobs you book, making a habit of going to open calls is a great tool for networking. Know How to Network Networking with casting directors, creative teams, and other performers is a great way to get jobs without representation. You never know what opportunities might come your way by simply knowing the right people. In fact, this is often something that managers work on with you. It’s easier said than done, but if you’re consistent about going to open calls and appointments, that can help a ton. You can also go out to see your friend's shows and cabarets, talk with performers, stay connected with your cast and crew from shows you’ve been in, and find new mentors and teachers to train with. These small steps add up quickly. This industry seems scary and giant, but it’s smaller than you think. Before you know it, you’ll find yourself recognizing everyone. Negotiate Your Contracts When you receive a job offer, it’s important to note that you don’t have to accept the first contract they send your way. I always encourage actors to negotiate one thing. Whether it be a room to yourself, a higher rate, or a travel stipend, it’s vital to advocate for yourself. Know your worth and figure out your deal breakers. Often, actors without representation get nervous about negotiating their own contracts, as they don’t want to appear rude or needy. I guarantee you that as long as you lead with kindness and don’t reply with a giant list of requests, people are used to negotiating. The worst thing they can say is no, so you might as well try to get your needs met. Know How to Market Yourself   Managers are useful when it comes to advice on branding and marketing yourself. When you don’t have that help, lean into easy tools to do so yourself. My biggest advice to performers who are self-marketing is to make a website and social media accounts. This doesn’t mean you have to be the best influencer in the world, but having clips of your art available to the public eye is vital. Picture this: you go into an audition and the casting director wants to see more from you, but they don’t have time in their day to ask for more material. They oftentimes will look for your website, Instagram, or YouTube to see if you have any clips available for them to watch. If they can’t find anything, you’re making it harder for them to give you a callback. The solution is simple. Have a couple of videos of you showing what you do best pinned to the top of your Instagram, and save your reels on your website and YouTube. If you want to go above and beyond, that’s wonderful, but the key is to make it easy for creative teams to find your materials. Have a Great Headshot and Resume Your headshot and resume are not just a first impression. They’re also the only pieces of you that stay in the room long after you leave, so be sure that they represent you accurately. You should take pride in how they look. When it comes to your headshots, work with photographers that you love, get them updated regularly, and have some different options for various projects. This sounds like a given, but they need to look like you. You never want to be in a position where you leave the room and the casting team can’t match you to your headshot. For your resume, include all of the essentials, including your contact information, experience, training, and special skills. If you’re ever confused about what to include or not include, a great way to start is to look at your mentor’s resumes and format yours accordingly. Once you have the basics done, you can make your resume feel like you. This can mean going above and beyond and making yourself a logo, but it can also be as simple as matching the font color to your headshot background. Ultimately, your headshot and resume should feel like a nice wrapped-up package of who you are. Having great materials makes casting teams excited to see what you bring to the table, so let your materials work to your advantage. You've Got This! Self-representing can be daunting and difficult, but the more comfortable you get with utilizing these tips, the better off you’ll be. Although it comes with extra challenges, you do not need representation immediately to succeed. You are your biggest advocate in this industry, so go out there and take the reigns of your career!

Written by Kelsey Jordan Ward Nebulizer Personally, I have the brand VocalMist – which I have had for over 2 years now with no issues, the quality is solid. I notice a huge difference in the longevity of my voice when doing long running contracts and I am using this consistently. I use a room temperature saline solution that creates the mist, helping to hydrate my vocal cords. You can use any brand, but the customer service of VocalMist has been unmatched. https://myvocalmist.com/   Vocal steamer I have a MyPurmist Free, but I believe any steamer will work. I use this sparingly when I need it. This primarily is for inflammation so I only use it when I feel like my throat is a little sore. I also use it the night before an audition/show/etc so I can give my voice time to cool down. Again, you can use any brand, however I personally like the fact that mine is a wireless handheld device, so I can easy to pack it and take with me to auditions. If you only plan on using it at home, however, there are a ton of other options you could use.  http://mypurmist.com Vocal Zone Lozenges Keeping in theme with the vocal health supplies – I found these lozenges through MaryKate Morrissey, Broadway's current Elphaba, who posted about them on TikTok. I was a HUGE Grether’s Pastille’s loyalist until I found these and now I won’t go back. Fair warning: they taste AWFUL the first time you try them. I got used to them and don’t mind the flavor anymore, but if you are someone who is sensitive to taste, maybe take it slow at first. When MaryKate said she feels like she can sing anything after she has one, she really isn’t lying. Get them on amazon here Neti Pot I know I said only one more vocal health device, but this can also fit into general health as well. I have had the same Neti Pot since high school, and it has never led me astray. Especially during allergy season, it helps to keep my phonation clear without any extra pressure. Use this very sparingly. The salt in the saline solutions is meant to dry out your sinuses and it will start to hurt after a while if you use it too much. I also only use it with purified or boiled water for safety. Belt Box This has been a lifesaver for vocal warm ups – whether in NYC or other hotel rooms across the world. You never know how thin the walls will be, and who else will be near you while you’re warming up. Having the ability to sing full volume (without others hearing) is such a win. I even asked my roommate once if she could hear me in the room next to mine, and she said she never has. https://www.beltyafaceoff.com/   ReadyFreddie Jumpsuit This is not an ad and I am in no way, shape or form being paid to say this, but this is my favorite purchase of the year. I found them on TikTok over a year ago and have been holding out for them to restock for AGES. I bought the long yellow adult jumpsuit and I love it! It’s a perfect and cozy jumpsuit for performers to wear while getting ready – it even comes with a pocket for your mic! The sizing can be tricky for shorter girls, as the adult size is very long if you get the pants version. I ended up hemming mine about 1.5-2 inches because it was slightly too long for me, but that doesn’t change my opinion in the slightest. https://readyfreddieshop.com/ iPad I feel like such an iPad kid when I say this, but it’s true. Going digital has truly revolutionized the auditioning and rehearsal game for me. The apps I mostly use are ForScore (for storing my music and my book), GoodNotes (for any rehearsals for current projects) and ArrangeUs (for choreography formations). It feels like a big investment, but I bought mine in 2020, and it still works as well as it did when I bought it. I also have yet to run into any issues with an accompanist when I bring my iPad in. Most actually seem to prefer it, which is awesome. http://apple.com/ipad Actor’s Access Membership We all have a love hate relationship with these casting sites don’t we? However, once I got my media to a place where I felt confident in every video I had, I have found that my AA account has been the best thing for me to submit to theaters. I have used other casting sites in the past, and am still on multiple, but if I had to choose one to get above the rest – it would be AA. The caveat is that it costs $22/minute of material that you upload which, can add up quickly. However, something to note is that if you upload multiple clips at a time, it will count the cumulative amount of time and not each individual clip. My agent told me that I should aim for a clip to be 20-30 secs of my best material. Let them know you can sing/act/dance, and they will give you the material they need to see from you in the callback. http://actorssaccess.com Dance classes and voice lessons You never stop learning. You should always be finding ways to get better and to hone in your craft even as you start working professionally. My favorite place to take dance class is Broadway Dance Center. I plan to try Steps once I am back in NYC. Special shout out to Bryan Knowlton and Jason Wise, who are some of my favorite classes to take at BDC! As far as voice lessons go, find someone who gets YOU and your voice. Just because they work with people on Broadway doesn’t mean they are the best fit for you. http://broadwaydancecenter.com Post audition treats Let’s be honest. This industry is hard. I’ve flown to other countries for callbacks this year with no guarantee that it would be worth it. Sometimes, you did all you could, and you just weren’t what they were looking for. Inspired by theatre Tiktok's Cara Rose DiPietro, I give myself a little treat for just doing the damn thing. Get the latte, the cookie, that cute little mug you have been eying for weeks. It doesn’t have to be a big thing and it doesn’t have to be every day! Those of us who feel like we are always in auditions know that it can add up quickly, but find something to reward yourself for continuing to chase your dreams every single day. You’ve earned it.

Step into the captivating world of "Behind The Scenes," a compelling series crafted by the talented Giuliana Mancini . In this immersive exploration, she delves deep into the lives of fellow actors she encounters while navigating the relentless audition circuit. Experience the raw emotions and untold stories of performers as they share their daily tribulations and triumphs in the pursuit of their dreams. Friday, November 22nd It’s cold & windy for the first time in weeks in New York. About 37 degrees. Rain has come for the first time since September. It’s 7:58 am. I leave my apartment & stop at my local Dunkin' Donuts. The iced coffee was a bold choice, as my fingers increase in numbness & a reddish hue. It’s 8:05. I get on my train & watch the buildings disappear as we head underground. I get off at 49th street. It’s 8:34 . I walk to the Actor’s Equity Building. Today, there’s an Equity Chorus Call for St. Louis Stage’s 2025 Season, & an Equity Principal Audition for Playwrights Horizons’ production of Prince F*ggot. Frankly, I’m a bit nervous. Which is silly, because the fourth floor of the Equity building is a very familiar place. I’ve spent many hours there. With closed eyes, guiding myself around, not as any sort of test, but because that’s the best my eyes could do at 6:13 in the morning. Today, however, I’m not auditioning, I’m interviewing. Which, supposedly, is the same thing. An audition is a job interview. Folks piling in, one after the other, with their own unique experiences, desires, facades, given just under two minutes to clinch their employment. I’ve done that thousands of times before. Why be nervous now? Now it's a little different. I’m on the “other side” of the table. Well, I’m interested in asking actors to talk about themselves; something, I even, admittedly love to do [see the number of times the pronoun ‘I’ is used]. But not all actors will. It’s inherently within our craft to know our characters on a deep level. Some philosophies require one to be that familiar with oneself, others abhor it. But I am interested, fundamentally, in the community of working actors that come to these EPA’s, ECC’s, & more. Non-union & equity. I’m interested in their careers, their paths, their passions outside of this. I am interested in their stories, their hopes, their dreams, their frustrations, their advice, & giving them a platform to express themselves. I love asking questions. I love knowing more. I love people. Specifically, I love actors. And I hope they are interested in sharing those with me, and with you, dear reader. I am still nervous, even though I’ve been in this building before, and auditioned thousands of times, I still, personally, get nervous. Because I care deeply. Not just about the work of acting but about the people who are actors. As Phoebe Waller Bridge wrote, “People are all we’ve got.” And that’s why I found myself in the Equity Building today -- to get to know my people. . . . It’s 8:41 . There are a couple of chairs right when I walked out of the elevator. In those are Julia & Evan. Lively, chatting, I approach both of them & ask for an interview. They kindly oblige. Julia’s initial part of the interview experienced some technical difficulties. However, here are the important facts to know; Julia Iaquinta [she/her] has been auditioning in the city for about two and a half years. She went to IAMT, a conservatory in Washington Heights. She got up at 6:30 that morning to commute in. Her makeup is done beautifully. Her hair is slicked back into a ponytail. She swirls her Dunkin’ Refresher in her hands, but doesn’t take a sip during the interview. She has the kind of smile that spreads warmth, like coming back to the heat of your apartment after the first really windy day of winter. Her eyes are wide, & incredibly accepting of a stranger approaching her this early in the morning. Something to be admired. Giuliana: What’s the most surprising part of the industry? Julia: Something that was surprising to me, I would say, is finding out connections is pretty important, but also, really strange at the same time. G: For sure. J: Because you don’t want to come off being like, ... ‘ Give me a job ’ ... G: Totally. J: But I also just feel like, being yourself and being a good person goes a long way. G: How do you approach your craft? J: I think just staying consistent is really important, and is also really hard, too. But, I think constantly for me, I try to point out my weakest parts. I try to take more singing classes and privates as often as I can, as well as training constantly. G: How do you then approach auditions? J: Honestly, the first few years I was auditioning, I went to anything and everything, to be so honest, because I wanted to get used to feeling how it is in a room. Like, cruise auditions, Broadway auditions, how different they are, how it is in the room. And just getting like, comfortable and prepared so that when I am going in for something bigger, I can feel like really ready. I thought that was really important and I’m glad I did that. But I try to go to everything, honestly, that I fit the breakdown. G: That you’re right for. J: That I’m right for, exactly. And it’s hard when you’re non-equity and you have to wake up at 5 o’clock in the morning, so you have to be selective. But I do try to get out as much as I can. G: Totally. Obviously we all work a day job; Is your day job flexible with this? J: Honestly, I’m really thankful, they’re really flexible. One of my managers has a daughter in the industry so it’s really sweet. G: & what do you do for work? J: I’m a server & a bartender. G: Slay. J: Yes! I work at Bareburger. G: This is a two fold question; What’s the best part of all of this & what’s the hardest part of all of this? J: I feel like the best part is, like, in this career, I mean like, obviously this is what I want to do for the rest of my life, even like though the hard part comes in, which is like, self doubt and am I gonna make it, and what I’ve taken from all of this is You Have to Keep Going. And when all of the famous people are like, “ If You Keep Going and Not Stop, You Will Achieve Your Dreams ” And I believe that, and I also believe that if you’re keeping up with your craft, it will pay off, 100%, even if it takes longer or shorter, you never know. But I truly believe that if you want this for the rest of your life, It Will Happen. G: What is your favorite thing you’ve seen recently J: Oh my god, easy. & Juliet. It’s my favorite Broadway show. G: Oh my god! Did you see Ms. Charli [D’Amelio] J: Okay, not yet, not that recent. But I probably am going to see Ms. Charli soon. G: I presume you are... dancer first? Julia puts her hand over her mouth, sheepishly confirming my observation. J: Yeeeeeees. I am. Yes I am. I very much am dancer first. G: We love!! We giggle together for a moment. G: Who are you when you’re not working in your career? What do you love outside of all of this? J: That’s a great question, oh my goodness. I do like to take Solidcore classes, and pilates... no I’m kidding. G: No, you’re a fit girlie. J: I like to train, Oh my goodness. You know what’s so funny? People that ask me that a lot, and I’m always like, well this is my life ..But you know what? This sounds so weird. I love to do like, crafty things. G: I don’t think that’s weird at all, I think that’s really awesome J: You know what I mean? I’ll see something on TikTok or Instagram, and think, ‘ I want to do that ’. Same thing with baking. I love doing, or making. G: Do you have the ‘ How hard could it be’ gene? J: Honestly... ya. Like... how hard could that be ? Like, I’ll do it. I feel like my boyfriend would come home and be like, ‘ What are you doing? ’ & the house would be a mess, with some sort of food or craft items. G: Do you have a website or a place people could follow you? J: You guys could follow me @julia_iaquinta G: Stunning. I’m an Italian queen myself. Thank you for your time. Julia gasps & we bond over how Italian our names sound. I turned to Evan, her counterpart.He’s been scrolling on his phone, respectfully. I know it’s his way of giving myself and Julia some privacy, which is greatly appreciated. I ask if he’s ready to go, and he springs into action. He’s wearing his streetwear, complete with a bandana wrapped around his head.Tufts of hair are peeking through, exposing the sunset color of his hair, the same hue as his mustache. His energy is vibrant. Not chaotic. Not excessive. Playful. Focused. Open. Giuliana: I’m just going to ask what your name and your pronouns are. Evan: Hello, my name is Evan K. Beesley , he/him pronouns G: What time did you get up this morning? E: I’m really lucky that I’m a man & I live in [Manhattan], so it takes me 20 minutes to get ready, so I woke up at 7:30? G: That’s not bad. E: No it really isn’t. G: And you are not in the union, currently? E: I am not, mama. Non-Equity baby. G: Dancer first? E: Well, you know, I don’t like to type myself. I like to say I fit myself in whatever mold I’m auditioning for that day. G: Period! You contain multitudes! E: Well, yes! G: When did you first decide you were going to be a performer? E: I mean, I don’t think there was ever a time where I didn’t think I was going to be a performer in some capacity. I was always loud & annoying as a young child. You know, always wanting attention. I think there was a time when my Bubbe tried to convince me that being an actor would lead to a life of disgrace , or something. I guess she wanted me to be a lawyer. So there was a few years where I was like, I can’t [be a performer]. And then I was like, you know what, I’m gonna do it . G: Did you go to school for performance? E: I certainly did. I got that BFA Baby. G: Who had the privilege of having you as a student? E: The Musical Theater program of the University of Utah. G: Is that where you’re from originally? Land of the Mormons? E: Well, yes. G: How long have you been auditioning? E: Seriously submitting for stuff, over a year and a half. Just got to the city, like, a month ago. G: Wait... diva. How are you doing? E: I’m living, laughing, loving. Like ... I’m being a part of it, as they say. G: New York, New York. E: Well, yes! G: Wow, oh my gosh. E: I’m like Thoroughly Modern Millie off the train, you know. She’s green but she’s happy. G: Three bucks, Two Bags, One Me. We laugh together E: I need to stop, actually. G: You’re perfect, never change..So, I know it’s been a short period of time, but what has surprised you the most about the industry so far? E: It’s crazy how interconnected it all is. Like, in a good way, it’s fun to see how close the artists are here. Especially considering how many there are, & how large this industry is. So it feels special that I’m a part of this cohort of people who are trying to get there, you know? G: It is really special. How do you approach your craft? E: Um, I’m of the mindset, where I just need as much training as I can get . So, as soon as I graduated school, where can I take class, what books can I read ; because there’s such a wealth of knowledge out there. Especially when it comes to theater, and I think there are a lot of possibilities for furthering one’s education, especially nowadays, sometimes in a good and a bad way. It’s become so much of a business now, even the education side of it, which I don’t honestly like, because there are more people pursuing this as a career. I just try to come at it from a perspective of, what’s next, where can we improve . G: Yeah, totally. And I have found, I don’t know if you agree with this, that everyone’s trying to sell you something. And we’re all human beings, we deserve to make a good honest living. We deserve to be fairly compensated for our skills. At the same time, there are so many different acting classes in the city, and they’re an arm and a leg. And I might not get something out of them, & that’s not to discredit that person’s skill, but it’s just really hard to tell. Which dance or voice teachers you connect to. E: Totally. And any specialized industry is going to have a paywall. But it does feel like it is Pay to Play, you can pay for this amount of classes or joining the union, whatever it may be. But you know, the Demons prevail, but so do we. We just keep on fighting, keep on learning. I read a lot of books. Read books, buy a book, it’s cheaper. G: okay literate! We laugh together again.It feels like we’ve developed a quick kinship with one another. These moments are some of the best at auditions. Meeting the types of people who simply... get it. G: So, we talked about how you approach your craft; how do you approach auditions? E: I mean, a girl just wants to work, you know? G: Yeah. E: A girl just wants to be out there. I want to be out on the stage, I want to do what I know how to do. So, if I am even vaguely a part of what they’re looking for, I’m showing up. I used to be the kid, if I was 14 & the call would be for 18 & up, I would be like, ‘ Well, I’m going. Well, they need me .’ So, I’m not that crazy anymore. But I was that person for a while. I just try to go to enough as possible.The feeling of just going, even if I think I’m not going to be seen, beats the feeling of, ‘ I’m just gonna sleep in ’. I came all this way, and I’m here now, like, to not be going to auditions is like... G: Like you don’t want to disrespect yourself by not giving yourself a chance? E: Yeah, and like, I don’t know sports. You miss every shot you don’t make , is that like, said by Michael Jordan? G: Said by Wayne Gretzky, and then said by Michael Scott [the fictional Boss in the hit TV series ‘The Office”]. We got there, diva. E: At least I said someone in basketball. I didn’t have the heart to tell Evan in the moment that Wayne Gretzky was a hockey player. Sometimes, the devil truly is in the details. It’s my belief, however, the devil shouldn’t be summoned before 9am. G: What’s the best part of all of this and what’s the hardest part of all of this? E: I mean, it is magical, coming to auditions in the city. I remember my first callback, where I had to fly into the city, and I was like, it’s all happening . G: You’re like, I’m that girl . E: I said, I’m Liza Minnelli, singing New York, New York . Everything is romantic , Charli XCX said it right. Like, yes, we wake up early, we wait in lines, we probably won’t get seen, but there is always an electricity in those rooms that is palpable, you know? It’s inspiring, to see people come from all across the country, all across the world, even, to chase after this. That just can’t be replicated anywhere else. G: Yeah. And the hardest part for you? E: The hardest part is getting up in the morning. I am a night owl. I’ll be so f*cking for real. Also, as a theater person, we aren’t conditioned for this. The night begins when the show ends, you know what I’m saying? I strategically, in college, made it so I never had a class before 9am. Because... I’m just not that girl , as Elphaba Thropp once said. G: And famously Galinda, as well. Glinda, excuse me, in Part Two. No spoilers. Who are you when you aren’t working on your career? What do you love to do that has nothing to do with getting up on that stage? E: Tea. I mean, I like to feel artistic in other ways as well. All of the things I love to do feed into the arts in some way, and I think, inspire each other in some way. So I like to write, creatively. Like poetry. But I kind of surmise how I’m feeling in these very cryptic poems. I love to cook, and watch movies. I’m a Letterboxd girlie. G: May I ask, your top four? E: On Letterboxd? I pick my favorite ones of genre.You ’ve got La La Land, I mean, it’s La La Land. Clue from 1985. Sound of Music, because I mean... she is the Blueprint. And I mean, this is nerdy, but Streetcar Named Desire with Marlon Brando & Vivian Lee. G: Can I tell you, that bisexual man... E: There are no words. G: There’s a really fabulous production that the National did with Gillian Anderson. It’s stunning, gorgeous. You should 100% watch it. E: I love Streetcar. G: That’s MY suggestion. For the readers. Last question! Do you have any website, social media, that you want to leave us with? E: I mean I keep it easy, it’s @evankbeesley, at whatever you’re looking for. Instagram, website , Letterboxd, for all of my film buffs out there. It’s 9:07am. I say, “Break legs” to Julia & Evan, & head back to my things. These conversations, frankly, have gone very well. My nerves assuaged, I finally eat my room temperature Dunkin' Donuts bagel. I’m unsure, as I eat, if now is the moment to go home, or if I pursue more interviews. The monitor announces to the room that both auditions would be seeing non members. The energy climbs. This means that the monitor, at any time, could call your name. Since we’re in the Equity building, if an auditioner’s name is called, they take their things and go to the 16th floor, where they will wait to line up with the monitor there. The room isn’t crowded, and it’s still early. This is an excellent sign for these actors. For me, however, I know if I were to interview anyone else, there would be a chance mid-interview their name would be called & they would need to leave abruptly. As I’m considering all different scenarios, I scan the room looking for a face comfortable enough to approach. In the corner, peering through stylishly smart glasses, I find it in a familiar expression. Tall, lean, & stylish, I see Christian. We did a play about a year ago together. He’s thoughtful, tender, & well read. A pleasant sight. We chat for a bit, and I ask if he would mind being interviewed. We retreat to the corner of the room, where we get a sense of a bit more privacy. In our own little corner, in our own little chair, we can be whatever we want to be, etc. etc. Giuliana: So, if you want to state your name, and your pronouns. Christian: My name is Christian Negron, I use he and they pronouns. G: What time did you get up this morning? C: I got up at 4am. G: No! C: I’m a commuter, I live in Long Island currently. So, with the commute, that’s the time that I woke up. G: Sad. C: Yup. G: What number are you on the list? C: I’m #13 on the non-equity list. G: Very exciting. How long have you been auditioning? C: Professionally, about two and a half years. G: And what’s been the most surprising thing that you’ve found about the professional industry? C: I think before I started professionally auditioning, I was very stressed out about the culture of how stressful and cutthroat this business is, which it is, definitely. But in my experience, I was really taken aback with how nice people are & the gathered community. It’s been really nice seeing people at different calls, and stuff like that. G: Okay, how do you approach your craft as a performer? C: I try to soak up as much information, knowledge as I can. Whether that’s reading new plays, or just any sort of literature. Seeing as many shows as I can, collaboration. I have a lot of friends that are writers & getting to read their work. Like a sponge, soaking up as much as I can. I feel like I can rely on the technique that I learned in school; I know the work is there.It ’s about growing as I get older with the life experience that I have. G: How do you approach auditions? C: It depends. I do a lot of Shakespeare, so if I’m auditioning for a Shakespeare company, or a contemporary play or a musical, it varies. I like to prep as much as I can. I always like to have at least a couple monologues in my back pocket. I don’t like to prep for things last minute, sometimes you have to, but I don’t like to be super stressed in the holding room. So that I can just go in the room, and be present. Sleep as much as I can the night before. Hydration, coffee. And definitely also music, to calm me down. G: Do you have a specific audition playlist? C: I wouldn’t say it’s anything specific, just any music that makes me feel good, or relaxed. The band HAIM is one of my favorite bands. I’m always listening to them. They make me feel good. G: When did you first decide, I want to be a ‘performer’? C: Not to be super topical... but with the Wicked movie* coming out, * The Wicked movie came out the day of this interview I remember I was like, 9 years old, and I almost put on a super amateur production of Wicked, in like my basement. Like, I built props and set pieces out of cardboard, there was this whole thing. I would definitely say around that time, that was the first show, musical, that I fell in love with, that made me get into acting, and performing, and music. Musical theater was my gateway into performing. G: The gateway drug. C: Of course. G: Okay, this is a two part question. What’s the best part of all of this, and the hardest part of all of this? Chris takes a deep breath. C: The best part of all this? You know, I remember someone, I think it was a professor of mine, telling me in school that, you know, as actors, we’re not going to be booked all of the time. & Auditioning is a chance to get to act . Having to remind myself in these moments that are super stressful, ‘ No, I get to do the thing that I really love to do ’, even if it’s just for a really short time. Reminding myself of that. And the hardest thing is, I mean, I would be remiss to mention that rejection is super hard, of course. G: Yeah. C: Having to constantly put yourself out there and the vulnerability of that is super hard for me, personally. You know, it’s something that ebbs and flows. Sometimes it’s easier and sometimes it’s harder. Having to keep showing up is really hard . But we do it anyway. G: Yeah. We do the hard thing. One of my mentors in school said, ‘As an artist, sometimes it’s really hard to not wake up and feel like a failure ’. I think that’s so true, what you’re saying. You just have to keep going, even when you feel like a failure, or there is all this rejection, because then you get to do the thing that you love. Which is sick..Who are you when you’re not working? Like, what do you love to do that has nothing to do with your career? C: I’m a big... walker. That sounds very like, weird. But if I can walk anywhere, I will. People think I’m crazy when I walk 50 city blocks, or something like. I prefer to walk. I like to, I don’t know, be out in the world. G: You said, The Subway Is Not For Me . C: No, no. Also, like the subway is scary. If I can walk, I’ll walk. I definitely picked that up as a pandemic thing. I like to do it, especially to clear my head. I mean it’s related to entertaining but I’m a big music person. I play the guitar & the piano.I’m a big concert goer. Like, if there’s a big concert, trust, I’m going to buy a ticket.I love hearing live music. And recently traveling. I went out of the country for the first time this year, and I already have plans to do some more traveling. G: Where’d you go, if you don’t mind me asking? C: I went to London. G: Okay, not to make this about me, I lived in London for four months. It was so amazing, highly highly recommend. Since you mentioned music, any favorite concerts that you have gone to as of late? Who’s your album of the year this year? C: This year, I went to see Ryan Beatty. He’s this really amazing artist & he performed in Brooklyn in February. & it was this super intimate, amazing set. And it was one of the best live performances I’ve seen, ever. And also, brat, album of the year. G: period. It’s a brat summer. A brat fall. A brautumn. C: Yes. G: Finally, do you have any website or social media you’d like to share with the class? Anything you’d like to promote as of the moment? C: Yeah, my website is https://www.christiannegron.com/ & you can find me on Instagram @chrisanegron . And, I don’t know if anyone will be in Nebraska next March & April but I’m doing a play called The Night Larry Kramer Kissed Me in Omaha, Nebraska. G: Thank you again, so much for your time. It’s 9:32. I pack my things up and leave, as the monitor picks up speed. Julia & Evan have been called up to dance, & Christian will be called up for their monologue soon. I take the elevator downstairs. It’s 9:47. I walk out of the Equity building, and the outside world feels a little less brutal than before.

The research included in this essay was originally presented at the 46th Comparative Drama Conference.  The world of the American musical theatre is one steeped in intrigue, lush with its own traditions, lore, and cast of characters. Yet, one industry-wide convention continues to encapsulate the expectations of what it means to be a performer on the Great White Way and beyond. To perform is to suffer. And to suffer is to be celebrated. Theatrical performers, both through their experiences in artistic communities and as members of our labor-focused greater society, are indoctrinated with this belief from the earliest beginnings of their artistic careers. In my own early years as a performer, I vividly remember a teacher’s retelling of Kristin Chenoweth’s heroic return to the previews of Wicked  in a bedazzled brace following a neck injury. In 2017, Hugh Jackman went against his doctor’s orders to not sing post-surgery during a rehearsal for The Greatest Showman ; the video of him doing so went viral, accompanied by overwhelmingly positive comments praising the actor for his dedication. In the same year, Andy Karl tore his ACL in previews for Groundhog Day  on Broadway, prompting a New York Times article documenting Karl’s choice to return to the stage only two days later in order to open the production. Karl rubbed some dirt (and a cortisone injection) in it and managed to secure a Tony nomination for his efforts. Stories such as these saturate the history of musical theatre, and, I believe, have contributed significantly to the Herculean physical expectations placed on the modern-day theatre performer. However, it is expectations like these that consistently threaten the casting prospects, artistic identities and overall health of performers living with chronic illnesses, disabilities, or recurring injuries. As American society strives for greater inclusivity, the world of theatrical performance fails to keep up through its inherent presumptions of ability.   As the most widely-accepted indicator of American excellence in theatre, Broadway’s attitude towards disability has shown incremental change. Ali Stroker is a Tony Award-winning actor for her performance in Daniel Fish’s 2019 revival of Oklahoma! ; she is the first wheelchair-using actor to have ever been nominated for such an award. In more recent seasons, productions like Cost of Living  and Kimberly Akimbo  have pushed the experiences of people living with disabilities to the forefront of the artistic conversation. Most theatre-centered media outlets have shifted their vernacular towards acknowledging the courage of performers who advocate for proper accommodations rather than celebrating those who perform at risk of endangering themselves. Take Playbill’s 2023 article recounting Maria-Christina Oliveras’ struggle with major injury for example; the courage she employed when asking for proper accommodations to join the cast of Between Riverside and Crazy  is well-saluted in contrast to the aforementioned articles memorializing Broadway stars and their possibly dangerous personal medical decisions. However, while the highest-paying levels of the theatre community begin to change the way in which they engage with disability, accessibility and acceptance throughout all professional platforms for performers are not the norm.  In the case of disability on stage, musical theatre historian Ryan Donovan writes that “Broadway prefers disability when it stays metaphorical, difference when it's assimilated into the mainstream by the finale, and both absent by the curtain call.”  While Donovan writes of this categorization in regards to the imaginary worlds created by performers onstage, his proclamation extends to those gracing the boards. In mimicry of the greater American workforce, Donovan writes that the Broadway machine has continued to marginalize disabled performers in favor of “intact, interchangeable bodies”; these workers must be able to conduct labor at a level which will secure the highest possible revenue within the commercial circuit. Typically, this means artists must be able to repeat the same performance six to eight times over the course of a Broadway work week. These working conditions are physically demanding and exhausting even for the healthiest able-bodied performers, let alone those who are chronically ill, disabled, or experience recurring injuries. In order to fit the fiscal model that Broadway requires, performers are often forced to push beyond their physical limits. Failing to do so is stigmatized within the theatre community as a sign of laziness, or as an unwillingness to work hard at positions that are seen by most as a calling or a privilege, rather than a job. In an industry that celebrates hyper-ability, those who are physically incapable of matching this standard are often forced to compromise their health at the behest of their work. However, while these standards are enforced at the top, they are instilled at the entry point. Theatre education in America continues to promote “the show must go on” principles, requiring young performers to shape themselves to the needs of a production or role, sometimes at their own physical or emotional risk. Described as “yes, and” culture by Sara Božin  in her work with HowlRound Theatre Commons, the malleability required of performers in educational environments further instills the negative stigmas against those who cannot be so changeable. Unfortunately, I have experienced the pressures of these expectations first hand. As a student at a residential arts high school, I said nothing as a teacher threw me to the ground over and over again for the sake of perfecting a stage combat sequence. Even after winding up in an emergency clinic a few weeks later with a femoral neck fracture (i.e. a broken hip), I continued to uphold the doctrines described by Božin . Yes, and…can I perform on crutches? For years, I pushed through chronic pain, exacerbating major injuries to maintain the façade of my hyper-ability as a performer. And when this pattern did catch up to me, I was terrified that my need to take off show days for injuries would reach the ears of industry professionals who held my bookability in their hands.  However, as the publicized attitude towards accessibility and inclusion began to change in recent years, I, too began to question the negative biases I had imposed on myself. After years of minimizing my conditions in order to get cast, the need to preserve certain aspects of my physical health simply no longer allowed me to do so. After instilling this refreshing personal outlook in my auditions, an offer finally came my way for a career-changing off-Broadway gig in 2023. Assured by the changes made at the top-paying levels, I asked for clearer language regarding the physical demands of the contract beyond performing. Maybe a weight limit addendum to the carte blanche requirement of lifting heavy set pieces, for which I was more than happy to provide a doctor’s note. In response, the company expressed reservations about hiring me at all. Despite my assurances that these accommodations would not hinder my ability to perform, they questioned me yet again with a discriminating comment about both my age and injuries. Seeing the forest for the trees, I decided to walk away. It has taken me many years to understand that a place of work that fails to accommodate differently abled performers at the starting gate will surely uphold this sentiment as a part of its greater culture. Therefore, it is not the place for me.  Unfortunately, this outcome is not typical. Choosing to walk away from a production contract is the scariest of decisions for performers when employment opportunities are already so few and far between. Furthermore, choosing to do so in favor of one’s health can label the performer as “difficult” in theatre circles, an additional ink blot on someone’s employability. Even performers protected by labor unions and agent representation experience pushback on accessibility; yet, the stigmas surrounding performers with chronic illnesses, disabilities, and recurring injuries disproportionately affect nonunion workers who may be forced to put their health at risk for the sake of consistent work. Like me, many will feel pressured to hide or minimize their conditions in order to pass as able-bodied, therefore further instilling the presumption of hyper-ability and the ideology of the body as a machine in service to the higher craft. Fear breeds this cycle, and, unfortunately, will continue to force many into impossible decisions. To perform or not to perform? Being healthy is the question. However, if disabled performers on Broadway can attain accessibility and visibility, surely this means the same is possible for those still working their way towards such high heights. I believe the first line of responsibility in protecting these performers lies with those who choose to educate them. As Dr. Mark Seton writes in a 2009 report discussing the healthcare of actors in training, “Both teacher and students shape, as they are shaped by, each other.” In a world where most theatre educators have gained their expertise through practical work as performers in their own right, the harmful biases of the theatrical community at large can and will continue to negatively permeate the educational experience. As a solution, Seton demands: “There is the need for a greater accountability in the skill of teaching by actors who, without any specialist educational qualifications, work in drama schools.”  In addition to the need for better teacher training in the understanding and preservation of students’ mental and physical well-being, I believe new curriculums and training processes should come to include the instruction of bodily autonomy as a construct of personal health for students. Those with the grasp of their ability to say “no” without repercussion will be less likely to push beyond their physical limits, therefore better preserving their health over time. In his writing on “Young People, Musical Theatre and Identity,” Danny Braverman writes how learning processes such as these can allow disabled students to feel and be seen as “co-creators that bring [divergent contributions]” to the classroom rather than as disruptions to the status quo.  However, while these shifted attitudes and new skills will enter the workforce with the upcoming generation of performers, true equity is only achievable if their counterparts at the top continue to aim for change. According to a 2017 report from Actors’ Equity Association, less than one percent of Broadway production contracts go to those who self-identify as disabled. This number fails to represent the realistic number of disabled workers according to national records, and AEA Diversity and Inclusion reports continue to exhibit this phenomenon post pandemic. According to AEA’s 2021 report, this means potentially one out of every four workers “[is not] receiving equitable employment or [doesn’t] feel that they can share that part of themselves with their union or their workplace.”  Inclusivity and accessibility cannot continue to only benefit the select few, while the majority of performers with disabilities, chronic illnesses, and recurring injuries continue to work in fear. Through the proposed changes within the theatrical educational systems, and the continued courage of performers at all levels of theatrical labor, maybe we can meet in the middle to create a theatre community that is safe for all. A theatre community where no one has to walk away from their dream. A community where all bodies are celebrated, and not forced to change for the “good of the art.”

Winter is coming, and if you're a musical theatre actor -- you know that means two things: audition season and sick season. Now, these two things shouldn't go hand in hand, but unfortunately, those are the cards we've been dealt, and we all must collectively figure out a way to move through it. This list is truly for any actor -- whether you are currently in school, living in New York City auditioning, or touring out on the road. These tools will not only help you get through the next few months of cold weather and the audition hustle, it'll help you absolutely thrive. VocalMist VocalMist is a portable nebulizer that is created specifically for singers. I've had this life-saving contraption for over two years now, and I couldn't recommend it more. This works differently than a vocal steamer -- and I'll tell you how. A vocal steamer provides moisture directly to the vocal cords and upper respiratory tract. The nebulizer, on the other hand, has finer particles that can reach further into the lungs. The nebulizer can still help to bring moisture to the vocal cords, but it also helps with overall congestion in the entire respiratory system. I, personally, love VocalMist because of how small and compact it is. To use it, you need saline solution, which can be bought in bulk on Amazon. These saline containers are also very small, so it makes it nice and easy to throw into your audition bag with the VocalMist, or to carry a huge bulk of them on tour. Overall, it's easy to use, not incredibly expensive, and will help your voice stay nice and healthy. Entertainer's Secret Throat Spray To stay on theme with vocal health (in the winter -- that's honestly one of the hardest things to stay on top of), we have the Entertainer's Secret Throat Spray . This spray helps to provide rapid relief for a scratchy, sore, dry, or hoarse voice and throat. It does this by delivering moisture straight to the vocal cords and back of throat, using glycerin and aloe vera. Many actors on Broadway swear by this spray, and use it as an aid for days when their voice is feeling a little extra tired, or when the cold air is truly reeking havoc on the vocal cords. Don't let outside factors affect your performances or auditions, and take control! Having this handy little spray in your back pocket will be your secret weapon. Heating Pad A heating pad may sound like a basic item to have -- but what you may not realize is how many different ways this little device can help you out. Not only is it great to help with small aches and pains, but it is also a great tool to use to help your warm-up and recovery routines become more effective. In the winter, our muscles tend to get a bit tighter due to the cold weather. If you're a dancer -- you know just how frustrating this is. One great way to use a heating pad to your advantage is to use it as a warm up tool before a show, audition, or class. One of the biggest muscles that likes to tighten up during this time is the hamstrings. Let yourself sit with the heating pad on each hamstring for a few minutes, and then move into some dynamic stretching. This will help your hamstring loosen up a bit, and they'll be much more pliable once you get your body moving. Another part of the body that tightens up is the back or shoulders, so try to use the heating pad before a workout to encourage some extra warmth and blood flow to the area. A heating pad is also a great recovery tool as well. When you're cooling down your body at the end of the day, you can use the heating pad in the same way as you did when you warmed up. Once you let your muscles get warm, try some easy mobility exercises and stretches. This encourages oxygen and blood flow to the muscles, and you won't feel as sore the next day. The perfect audition bag When you're traveling around during the winter in a big puffy coat, hopping from audition to audition -- the last thing you want is to be carrying tons of different bags that have all of the things to get you through the day. If you invest in one bag that'll carry everything you need in an organized way, your back and your type-A tendencies will thank you. There are a few great bags on the market for this, so I'm going to recommend my two favorites. Lululemon Quilted Grid Tote Bag - This bag is not only cute to look at, but it can hold a good amount of things. There's a pocket that fits up to a 16 inch laptop, a large open center pocket that zips at the top, exterior slip pockets, and smaller zipped pockets on the inside. This is perfect to hold your music book, headshots and resumes, a pair of dance shoes or audition shoes, and even a rolled-up audition outfit. LoveVook Large Travel Backpack - This is a great option for dancers. This bag has one compartment that can keep things like headshots and resumes, phone chargers, a laptop, and even some makeup items. The large compartment in the backpack can fit a change of dance clothes, multiple dance shoes, and even hair products to touch up your hair. There are multiple other zippers and compartments as well, which can help you organize other items like snacks, medicine, and other accessories. A warm audition-outfit cover up Everyone loves a matching set, but nobody loves it more than dancers who have to layer up with a leotard and fishnets underneath their outfit while it's 20 degrees Fahrenheit outside. You don't just want any sort of set, however. You want it to be incredibly warm and incredibly cute. Here are my favorite sweat/travel sets to wear to auditions or on a travel day on tour. Abercrombie Essential Sunday Sweat Set - Catch me in these matching sweatpants and zip-up at the audition studios all winter long. It's so cozy, cute, and is nice and loose so it can fit over any type of dance audition outfit. Athleta Forever Fleece 1/4 Zip - I love this quarter zip for many reasons. It's nice and long, so it covers more of your body -- keeping you nice and warm. The quarter zip is absolutely perfect for when I have my audition makeup caked on -- as I can easily get the sweatshirt over my head without risking a makeup disaster. It's perfect to wear with a pair of leggings and a warm puffy coat.

By Kelsey Jordan Ward Cinderella -Lyric Stage Dallas A “dance captain” is someone in the cast of a show (typically in the ensemble) who is tasked with assisting with the choreography of a show. The dance captain is in charge of maintaining the choreography after the director and choreographer of the show leaves and the show opens, but they can also have other jobs as assigned by the creative team.  My name is Kelsey Jordan Ward and I am currently the Dance Captain for Twas The Night Before Christmas at Casa Mañana . This is my second time being a dance captain for this particular theater, but I have been a dance captain both educationally and regionally for multiple years. Let’s talk about how I got here and what I do as the dance captain.  How did I start out? Beauty and the Beast - Casa Manana My first time being a dance captain was in 2017, my junior year of college at Baylor University. In addition to being the dance captain, I was also the assistant choreographer for our fall musical, Crazy For You . I definitely fell into being a dance captain through choreography. I was a strong dancer coming into Baylor and had done choreography for my high school show choir, but I wanted to start choreographing professionally. I was lucky that I was working under a great choreographer that I was able to learn and grow from. I also learned a lot from her about how to support a choreographer as a dance captain.  Professionally, I started off in the ensemble for multiple theaters in the Dallas/Fort Worth area before I was given my first dance captain role in a production of Elf at The Firehouse Theater in Farmers Branch, TX. I had only ever worked with the music director prior to the show. Based on her recommendation and my performance in the dance call, I was cast as the dance captain for the show. I ended up being the dance captain for another show for that same choreographer later down the road as well.  The first time I was placed in this role at Casa Mañana was last fall for the show Beauty and the Beast Jr. I wasn’t originally contracted to be the dance captain, but was asked 2 days into rehearsal due to what the choreographer, Monica Kapoor, referred to as my “wide lens brain”. This was the first time I had heard this terminology, but I have since adopted it and use it frequently when I talk about the skills needed to be a good dance captain.  The most important skill you need Beauty and the Beast - Casa Manana You might be asking, “Well Kelsey, what is a wide lens and why is it important to have one as a dance captain?” When I view my track within a show I tend to view the stage as a whole. I know where everyone is onstage and how I relate to them within the space. This is what I typically refer to as a “wide lens” because I view the stage as a whole entity rather than just my track. Someone with a narrow lens tends to know what area of the stage they’re in and the people in their direct periphery, but they are mostly focused on their specific track. Having a wide lens allows me as a dance captain to stay aware of the stage as a whole and to keep up with the vision of the show so I can assist with the overall picture.  Depending on the show needs and the choreographer I am working with, my job looks a little different and it’s my job to adjust to the needs of that specific choreographer. Some choreographers want a ton of input from their dance captain and some just want them to be around to be helpful. Here are a couple duties I have currently or have had previously as a dance captain.  Teaching and placing people who were not there when we learned the choreography initially.  Reversing choreography to demonstrate while learning.  Giving notes if the choreographer is absent from rehearsal or if I am leading a separate rehearsal.  Running lift and fight call prior to each run of the show.  Leading a group stretch/warm up for people who want one before each run of the show.  Maintaining the choreography cleanliness after the show opens, primarily if there are any safety concerns.  How do I stay organized as dance captain? As a dance captain I have utilized multiple different tools and apps over the years to help me stay on top of the organization of a show. Formation apps like ArrangeUs and Formi help to keep all of the formations of the show straight in my head so I know how to adjust if someone is out or so I know what side of the stage someone is on when asking questions. As far as notating, I will typically try to write down choreography as I can (especially if that choreography doesn’t affect me directly in my track). I tend to use apps like GoodNotes or ForScore on my iPad so I can take notes easily and quickly, as well as erase choreography if it changes. Something I love about ForScore is the ability to add different layers so I can keep my personal track and my choreography notes separate.  How do I become a dance captain? Start building up relationships with choreographers you want to work with. Maybe you start going to their class if they teach or start showing up at auditions for shows they are on the creative team for. It’s likely you won’t be a dance captain for them right off the bat, but maybe they place you in the ensemble where you can showcase your skills. The more quality work you do, the more likely you are to be seen for leadership positions in the future.  Being a dance captain is hard work that more than often goes unrecognized by the audience. The time and effort put into the show by dance captains is what helps keep shows clean and engaging. However, I enjoy the work I do as a dance captain and I wouldn’t change my career for the world. Hopefully this gave you some insight into the world of a dance captain and all the work they do!

Have you ever been in the midst of a great weekly workout routine, feeling like you are finally motivated and noticing improvements – and suddenly you become plagued with fatigue and find yourself plateauing?  You may immediately think you need to change something about your routine. But, what about everything else outside of your routine that could be affecting your performance?   Sleep habits, nutrition, stress, and water intake all play a role in how our bodies feel overall. What some people don’t realize, however, is that when you start a new exercise program -- you need to make other lifestyle changes as well. As a certified nutrition coach and professional dancer , I'm going to share my top tips for helping your body to recover in the most effective way.   Sleep has more benefits than you'd think We all know the classic “8 or 9 hours of sleep a night” prescription. However, when you are expending more energy throughout the day, that sleep becomes even more precious. Here are some important benefits of sleep:   Gives your muscles a chance to rest and recover Regulates blood pressure Allows your digestive system to recover, through natural fasting Improves mental health Boosts your immune system Boosts memory function   Now, you might be wondering what you could do to improve your sleep. Here are some tiny lifestyle changes that have worked for me:   Limiting phone/TV usage one hour before bed Committing to a specific bedtime and wake-up time Reading before bed Meditation within an hour of bedtime Using a weighted blanket for extra comfort Enjoying a cup of herbal tea an hour before sleep ​ Fuel your body This is probably the most difficult subject to get a proper handle on.  But do not worry -- I will give you some simple tips to make this easier.     Let’s start with your base metabolic rate (BMR). We all have a BMR, which can be estimated through a calculation using our height, weight, and gender. I like to use this site for my calculations. This number tells us the number of calories we are burning per day just by simply living.    When you add working out on top of that, that leaves you with even more expended calories per day. Even if you are trying to lose fat, and want to be in a calorie deficit, you are going to need to eat as much as you usually do (or potentially more) because you are substantially increasing your calorie expenditure.    It is safe to stay within a 300-400 calorie deficit, but anything below that will be dangerous. The number one thing to remember is that you never want to be below your base metabolic rate. That calorie number is the number that your body needs to live. Here is what happens if you are not eating AT LEAST your base metabolic rate:   You will lose muscle mass Your body will hold on to nutrients in the form of fat in order to protect itself You will be depleted in physical and mental energy You will notice apparent mood changes Motivation will waver   Here are some easy tips to make sure you are getting enough calories and nutrients to support you in your new workout routine:   Aim to eat your weight in protein. So, if you are 130 pounds, try to have 130 grams of protein. Do not try to diet in any way.  Your body needs all three macronutrients (carbohydrates, fats and proteins) to sustain itself. Aim for nutrient-dense foods - meaning foods that have high nutritional value in terms of vitamins, minerals, and macronutrient sources. Some great examples are salmon, kale, potatoes, whole grain bread, edamame, and greek yogurt. Allow yourself to have your “fun foods” daily mixed with your well-balanced diet.  Restriction can lead to binges later.   Minimize stress as best you can Most people do not realize the impact stress can have on our ability to get through a workout or to achieve fitness goals in general.  The sneaky thing about stress is that it actually causes inflammation in the body - which leads to sore muscles and joints, fatigue, brain fog, and bloating. There are some simple things you can do to manage your stress daily:   Get enough sleep (hey, it’s all connected!) Practice meditation Eat anti-inflammatory foods, like berries, fatty fish, and leafy greens Take time for self-care - whether that be setting aside time to practice a hobby you enjoy, watch your favorite TV show, or chat with a friend. Practice gratitude. One easy way is to list 5 things you are grateful for either first thing in the morning or last thing in the evening.  ​ Don't forget that water plays an important role, too When you increase your physical activity, it is imperative that you up your water intake immensely.  Here are some things that can happen if you are not drinking enough water:   Headache Fatigue Loss of appetite Muscle cramps Mood swings   I have one simple trick that has worked wonders to help up my water intake.  When you first wake up in the morning, drink a big glass of water BEFORE you have your morning tea or coffee. That way, you are starting the day off strong.  Getting a pretty water bottle helps a bit, too.    Now that you know how all these different facets of your lifestyle can affect your physical fitness, you are going to be so much more successful in maintaining your workout routine.  So get out there -- work hard, sleep hard, eat hard, meditate hard, and drink hard (a glass of wine or a beer every so often isn’t a bad thing, either!). You’ve got this.

By Kelsey Jordan Ward As a non-union actor who is currently based in NYC but has spent the last 5 years post-grad in regional markets (DFW and Orlando), I know the struggle to get seen is real. While I recently signed with my agent in July of this year, I spent the first 10 years of my career learning how to be my own agent and manager rolled up into one. I drafted countless emails to casting and creative teams alike for years, advocated for myself and others, and honed in my craft to make myself the most castable version of me. I don’t have all the answers, but I believe that implementing these things every single day has made me a stronger artist and businesswoman. Because at the end of the day, theater is a business and you are your own personal CEO.  Get over your own ego This is going to sound harsh, so let me explain. We tend to worry as performers how we are going to be perceived by other people. By casting directors, by creative teams, by other performers, etc. that we will often talk ourselves out of reaching out to anyone before we even do it. The first step is asking yourself if you would be offended to receive the email you are going to send. Would you get offended? Upset? Probably not, so it is safe to say that the person on the receiving end of that email will likely feel the same way. The worst they can say is no. Put your best foot forward Getting a quality reel together that showcases YOU to your best ability. Not who you think they want you to be. Not every track calls for a double pirouette but most want to make sure you can move. Find some clips of you where you are moving well and put those together as a dance reel. For a vocal reel, you don’t need to be able to sing everything, but you need to showcase yourself in the best light, so give some contrasting clips of what you do best and get ready to send it.  Tell casting why they should hire you Some of the best advice I was ever given was to go into every audition with the mindset of “how can I help you”. Casting is a puzzle and casting directors are always looking for people to fit into those slots. It also never hurts you in casting for someone to know you are interested in doing a specific project or want to work with a specific director/company. Convey your interest in the specific show and let them know why you would be a good fit for the show. You don’t need to go into detail about every role you’ve played or all of your skills (that’s where you let your resume and reels speak for themselves) but give them the overview of what makes you a great performer and what makes you, YOU!  Build professional relationships I have been cast in shows at least 4 or 5 times because I had a pre-existing working relationship with directors who knew my work ethic, and when auditions for that show came around, I made it explicitly clear that I wanted to be in that show. “They’ll know I’m interested because I showed up to auditions” no they won’t. We are constantly auditioning for the next thing and it would be insane to say that we view each audition the same way. Directors know that too, and they want to cast people who they know are committed to this specific project. Two separate instances in the past 2 years, I reached out to the director of a show within hours of the season being posted to let them know that I was interested, available, and wanted to be at auditions whenever they happened. Both of those shows I booked and that is not a coincidence.  Be someone people want to work with I feel like this should be a given, but it costs you nothing to be nice to other people. To everyone behind the table at auditions, to the audition monitor, anyone in the audition room with you. Those people are your peers and you never know who you will be working with in the future. People generally want to help other people succeed (and if you don’t you suck) so having as many people in your corner (and being in their corner in return) is always beneficial. Also showing up prepared and ready to work. Having your lines memorized, working on your music outside of rehearsal, going over the choreography. Being a reliable person will beat being a talented person anyday.  Do your research Know who you are auditioning for and ask who is in the room before you go in (audition monitors are your best friend). If you are going in for a specific show, know the background of the show and the characters you are interested in. In theater, there is no such thing as being over prepared. Don’t drive yourself crazy with a whole deep dive into every single biography you can find, but have a background to work with. This also extends into once you have booked the job. Part of being your own advocate is staying consistent throughout the entire process.  Never stop showing up and never stop learning  It’s so easy to get discouraged in this industry. You are going to hear hundreds of “no’s” for every yes. Someone once told me “it’s the people who keep showing up that make it in this industry” and that really stuck with me because it is so true. I auditioned for the theater I am currently working for 5 or 6 times before getting my first contract with them. Every “overnight success” has likely been putting in the work for years beforehand. So keep showing up. Keep talking those voice lessons, dance classes, workshops, etc. to keep working on your craft every day. Keep taking care of yourself physically and mentally so you are performance ready whenever that time comes (and trust me it will).  Know your worth and know when to walk away  This is a hard one to talk about because more often than not we as actors are told that we need to grin and bear it in order to not be seen as “rude” or “hard to work with”. I want to make sure that my earlier point of being nice and kind does not mean you will become a door mat. Knowing what your contract says and not allowing theaters to take advantage of you within that contract. Setting a minimum amount you are willing to be paid per week with yourself and holding strong to that. Speaking up when there is blatant abuse towards you or another person involved in the show. I have had to be the “whistleblower” in some instances like this, and it is not fun, but it is worth making the theater a safer environment for other performers.  Disconnect yourself from your career This seems counterintuitive, but I believe that we need separation from ourselves as actors and ourselves as people. Finding things outside of our career that bring us happiness and joy. I really love baking and cooking. I think there is nothing that a good Disney movie can’t fix. I am obsessed with my Nespresso but there’s something about when you find a cute coffee shop in Williamsburg that makes your lavender vanilla latte just right. Point is, you need to know yourself if you weren’t doing theater. How much of your identity is tied to what show you are cast in or what role you are playing next? Who are you outside of that and how can that inform how you behave as an actor? Knowing that what is meant for you will not pass you by   I think I have been saying this to myself since I was 18 during college auditions. I believed it then and I still believe it now. I think that every no gave way to some other opportunity or something I needed to do to be where I am today. Everytime I felt like I misstepped, I was given some reason why I should have been there in the first place. My career has not looked the way I thought it would when I was 18, but I wouldn’t change my experiences for the world. The best way I know to advocate for myself is to believe that I am exactly where I am meant to be.