Behind The Scenes : Episode 1

Step into the captivating world of "Behind The Scenes," a compelling series crafted by the talented Giuliana Mancini. In this immersive exploration, she delves deep into the lives of fellow actors she encounters while navigating the relentless audition circuit. Experience the raw emotions and untold stories of performers as they share their daily tribulations and triumphs in the pursuit of their dreams.

Friday, November 22nd

It’s cold & windy for the first time in weeks in New York. About 37 degrees. Rain has come for the first time since September.

It’s 7:58 am.

I leave my apartment & stop at my local Dunkin' Donuts. The iced coffee was a bold choice, as my fingers increase in numbness & a reddish hue.

It’s 8:05.

I get on my train & watch the buildings disappear as we head underground. I get off at 49th street.

It’s 8:34.

I walk to the Actor’s Equity Building. Today, there’s an Equity Chorus Call for St. Louis Stage’s 2025 Season, & an Equity Principal Audition for Playwrights Horizons’ production of Prince F*ggot.

Frankly, I’m a bit nervous. Which is silly, because the fourth floor of the Equity building is a very familiar place. I’ve spent many hours there. With closed eyes, guiding myself around, not as any sort of test, but because that’s the best my eyes could do at 6:13 in the morning. Today, however, I’m not auditioning, I’m interviewing. Which, supposedly, is the same thing.

An audition is a job interview. Folks piling in, one after the other, with their own unique experiences, desires, facades, given just under two minutes to clinch their employment. I’ve done that thousands of times before. Why be nervous now? Now it's a little different. I’m on the “other side” of the table. Well, I’m interested in asking actors to talk about themselves; something, I even, admittedly love to do [see the number of times the pronoun ‘I’ is used].

But not all actors will. It’s inherently within our craft to know our characters on a deep level. Some philosophies require one to be that familiar with oneself, others abhor it. But I am interested, fundamentally, in the community of working actors that come to these EPA’s, ECC’s, & more. Non-union & equity.

I’m interested in their careers, their paths, their passions outside of this. I am interested in their stories, their hopes, their dreams, their frustrations, their advice, & giving them a platform to express themselves. I love asking questions. I love knowing more. I love people. Specifically, I love actors. And I hope they are interested in sharing those with me, and with you, dear reader.

I am still nervous, even though I’ve been in this building before, and auditioned thousands of times, I still, personally, get nervous. Because I care deeply. Not just about the work of acting but about the people who are actors. As Phoebe Waller Bridge wrote, “People are all we’ve got.” And that’s why I found myself in the Equity Building today -- to get to know my people.

. . .

It’s 8:41.

There are a couple of chairs right when I walked out of the elevator. In those are Julia & Evan. Lively, chatting, I approach both of them & ask for an interview. They kindly oblige. Julia’s initial part of the interview experienced some technical difficulties. However, here are the important facts to know; Julia Iaquinta [she/her] has been auditioning in the city for about two and a half years. She went to IAMT, a conservatory in Washington Heights. She got up at 6:30 that morning to commute in. Her makeup is done beautifully. Her hair is slicked back into a ponytail. She swirls her Dunkin’ Refresher in her hands, but doesn’t take a sip during the interview.

She has the kind of smile that spreads warmth, like coming back to the heat of your apartment after the first really windy day of winter. Her eyes are wide, & incredibly accepting of a stranger approaching her this early in the morning. Something to be admired.

Giuliana: What’s the most surprising part of the industry?

Julia: Something that was surprising to me, I would say, is finding out connections is pretty important, but also, really strange at the same time.

G: For sure.

J: Because you don’t want to come off being like, ... ‘Give me a job’ ...

G: Totally.

J: But I also just feel like, being yourself and being a good person goes a long way.

G: How do you approach your craft?

J: I think just staying consistent is really important, and is also really hard, too. But, I think constantly for me, I try to point out my weakest parts. I try to take more singing classes and privates as often as I can, as well as training constantly.

G: How do you then approach auditions?

J: Honestly, the first few years I was auditioning, I went to anything and everything, to be so honest, because I wanted to get used to feeling how it is in a room. Like, cruise auditions, Broadway auditions, how different they are, how it is in the room. And just getting like, comfortable and prepared so that when I am going in for something bigger, I can feel like really ready. I thought that was really important and I’m glad I did that. But I try to go to everything, honestly, that I fit the breakdown.

G: That you’re right for.

J: That I’m right for, exactly. And it’s hard when you’re non-equity and you have to wake up at 5 o’clock in the morning, so you have to be selective. But I do try to get out as much as I can.

G: Totally. Obviously we all work a day job; Is your day job flexible with this?

J: Honestly, I’m really thankful, they’re really flexible. One of my managers has a daughter in the industry so it’s really sweet.

G: & what do you do for work?

J: I’m a server & a bartender.

G: Slay.

J: Yes! I work at Bareburger.

G: This is a two fold question; What’s the best part of all of this & what’s the hardest part of all of this?

J: I feel like the best part is, like, in this career, I mean like, obviously this is what I want to do for the rest of my life, even like though the hard part comes in, which is like, self doubt and am I gonna make it, and what I’ve taken from all of this is You Have to Keep Going. And when all of the famous people are like, “If You Keep Going and Not Stop, You Will Achieve Your Dreams” And I believe that, and I also believe that if you’re keeping up with your craft, it will pay off, 100%, even if it takes longer or shorter, you never know. But I truly believe that if you want this for the rest of your life, It Will Happen.

G: What is your favorite thing you’ve seen recently

J: Oh my god, easy. & Juliet. It’s my favorite Broadway show.

G: Oh my god! Did you see Ms. Charli [D’Amelio]

J: Okay, not yet, not that recent. But I probably am going to see Ms. Charli soon.

G: I presume you are... dancer first?

Julia puts her hand over her mouth, sheepishly confirming my observation.

J: Yeeeeeees. I am. Yes I am. I very much am dancer first.

G: We love!!

We giggle together for a moment.

G: Who are you when you’re not working in your career? What do you love outside of all of this?

J: That’s a great question, oh my goodness. I do like to take Solidcore classes, and pilates... no I’m kidding.

G: No, you’re a fit girlie.

J: I like to train, Oh my goodness. You know what’s so funny? People that ask me that a lot, and I’m always like, well this is my life..But you know what? This sounds so weird. I love to do like, crafty things.

G: I don’t think that’s weird at all, I think that’s really awesome

J: You know what I mean? I’ll see something on TikTok or Instagram, and think, ‘I want to do that’. Same thing with baking. I love doing, or making.

G: Do you have the ‘How hard could it be’ gene?

J: Honestly... ya. Like... how hard could that be? Like, I’ll do it. I feel like my boyfriend would come home and be like, ‘What are you doing?’ & the house would be a mess, with some sort of food or craft items.

G: Do you have a website or a place people could follow you?

J: You guys could follow me @julia_iaquinta

G: Stunning. I’m an Italian queen myself. Thank you for your time.

Julia gasps & we bond over how Italian our names sound.

I turned to Evan, her counterpart.He’s been scrolling on his phone, respectfully. I know it’s his way of giving myself and Julia some privacy, which is greatly appreciated. I ask if he’s ready to go, and he springs into action. He’s wearing his streetwear, complete with a bandana wrapped around his head.Tufts of hair are peeking through, exposing the sunset color of his hair, the same hue as his mustache. His energy is vibrant. Not chaotic. Not excessive. Playful. Focused. Open.

Giuliana: I’m just going to ask what your name and your pronouns are.

Evan: Hello, my name is Evan K. Beesley, he/him pronouns

G: What time did you get up this morning?

E: I’m really lucky that I’m a man & I live in [Manhattan], so it takes me 20 minutes to get ready, so I woke up at 7:30?

G: That’s not bad.

E: No it really isn’t.

G: And you are not in the union, currently?

E: I am not, mama. Non-Equity baby.

G: Dancer first?

E: Well, you know, I don’t like to type myself. I like to say I fit myself in whatever mold I’m auditioning for that day.

G: Period! You contain multitudes!

E: Well, yes!

G: When did you first decide you were going to be a performer?

E: I mean, I don’t think there was ever a time where I didn’t think I was going to be a performer in some capacity. I was always loud & annoying as a young child. You know, always wanting attention. I think there was a time when my Bubbe tried to convince me that being an actor would lead to a life of disgrace, or something. I guess she wanted me to be a lawyer. So there was a few years where I was like, I can’t [be a performer]. And then I was like, you know what, I’m gonna do it.

G: Did you go to school for performance?

E: I certainly did. I got that BFA Baby.

G: Who had the privilege of having you as a student?

E: The Musical Theater program of the University of Utah.

G: Is that where you’re from originally? Land of the Mormons?

E: Well, yes.

G: How long have you been auditioning?

E: Seriously submitting for stuff, over a year and a half. Just got to the city, like, a month ago.

G: Wait... diva. How are you doing?

E: I’m living, laughing, loving. Like ... I’m being a part of it, as they say.

G: New York, New York.

E: Well, yes!

G: Wow, oh my gosh.

E: I’m like Thoroughly Modern Millie off the train, you know. She’s green but she’s happy.

G: Three bucks, Two Bags, One Me.

We laugh together

E: I need to stop, actually.

G: You’re perfect, never change..So, I know it’s been a short period of time, but what has surprised you the most about the industry so far?

E: It’s crazy how interconnected it all is. Like, in a good way, it’s fun to see how close the artists are here. Especially considering how many there are, & how large this industry is. So it feels special that I’m a part of this cohort of people who are trying to get there, you know?G: It is really special. How do you approach your craft?

E: Um, I’m of the mindset, where I just need as much training as I can get. So, as soon as I graduated school, where can I take class, what books can I read; because there’s such a wealth of knowledge out there. Especially when it comes to theater, and I think there are a lot of possibilities for furthering one’s education, especially nowadays, sometimes in a good and a bad way. It’s become so much of a business now, even the education side of it, which I don’t honestly like, because there are more people pursuing this as a career. I just try to come at it from a perspective of, what’s next, where can we improve.

G: Yeah, totally. And I have found, I don’t know if you agree with this, that everyone’s trying to sell you something. And we’re all human beings, we deserve to make a good honest living. We deserve to be fairly compensated for our skills. At the same time, there are so many different acting classes in the city, and they’re an arm and a leg. And I might not get something out of them, & that’s not to discredit that person’s skill, but it’s just really hard to tell. Which dance or voice teachers you connect to.

E: Totally. And any specialized industry is going to have a paywall. But it does feel like it is Pay to Play, you can pay for this amount of classes or joining the union, whatever it may be. But you know, the Demons prevail, but so do we. We just keep on fighting, keep on learning. I read a lot of books. Read books, buy a book, it’s cheaper.

G: okay literate!

We laugh together again.It feels like we’ve developed a quick kinship with one another.

These moments are some of the best at auditions. Meeting the types of people who simply... get it.

G: So, we talked about how you approach your craft; how do you approach auditions?

E: I mean, a girl just wants to work, you know?

G: Yeah.

E: A girl just wants to be out there. I want to be out on the stage, I want to do what I know how to do. So, if I am even vaguely a part of what they’re looking for, I’m showing up.

I used to be the kid, if I was 14 & the call would be for 18 & up, I would be like, ‘Well, I’m going. Well, they need me.’ So, I’m not that crazy anymore. But I was that person for a while. I just try to go to enough as possible.The feeling of just going, even if I think I’m not going to be seen, beats the feeling of, ‘I’m just gonna sleep in’. I came all this way, and I’m here now, like, to not be going to auditions is like...

G: Like you don’t want to disrespect yourself by not giving yourself a chance?

E: Yeah, and like, I don’t know sports.You miss every shot you don’t make, is that like, said by Michael Jordan?

G: Said by Wayne Gretzky, and then said by Michael Scott [the fictional Boss in the hit TV series ‘The Office”]. We got there, diva.

E: At least I said someone in basketball.

I didn’t have the heart to tell Evan in the moment that Wayne Gretzky was a hockey player. Sometimes, the devil truly is in the details. It’s my belief, however, the devil shouldn’t be summoned before 9am.

G: What’s the best part of all of this and what’s the hardest part of all of this?

E: I mean, it is magical, coming to auditions in the city. I remember my first callback, where I had to fly into the city, and I was like, it’s all happening.

G: You’re like, I’m that girl.

E: I said, I’m Liza Minnelli, singing New York, New York.Everything is romantic, Charli XCX said it right. Like, yes, we wake up early, we wait in lines, we probably won’t get seen, but there is always an electricity in those rooms that is palpable, you know? It’s inspiring, to see people come from all across the country, all across the world, even, to chase after this. That just can’t be replicated anywhere else.

G: Yeah. And the hardest part for you?

E: The hardest part is getting up in the morning. I am a night owl. I’ll be so f*cking for real. Also, as a theater person, we aren’t conditioned for this. The night begins when the show ends, you know what I’m saying? I strategically, in college, made it so I never had a class before 9am. Because... I’m just not that girl, as Elphaba Thropp once said.

G: And famously Galinda, as well. Glinda, excuse me, in Part Two. No spoilers. Who are you when you aren’t working on your career? What do you love to do that has nothing to do with getting up on that stage?

E: Tea. I mean, I like to feel artistic in other ways as well. All of the things I love to do feed into the arts in some way, and I think, inspire each other in some way. So I like to write, creatively. Like poetry. But I kind of surmise how I’m feeling in these very cryptic poems. I love to cook, and watch movies. I’m a Letterboxd girlie.

G: May I ask, your top four?

E: On Letterboxd? I pick my favorite ones of genre.You’ve got La La Land, I mean, it’s La La Land. Clue from 1985. Sound of Music, because I mean... she is the Blueprint. And I mean, this is nerdy, but Streetcar Named Desire with Marlon Brando & Vivian Lee.

G: Can I tell you, that bisexual man...

E: There are no words.

G: There’s a really fabulous production that the National did with Gillian Anderson. It’s stunning, gorgeous. You should 100% watch it.

E: I love Streetcar.

G: That’s MY suggestion. For the readers. Last question! Do you have any website, social media, that you want to leave us with?

E: I mean I keep it easy, it’s @evankbeesley, at whatever you’re looking for. Instagram, website, Letterboxd, for all of my film buffs out there.

It’s 9:07am.

I say, “Break legs” to Julia & Evan, & head back to my things. These conversations, frankly, have gone very well. My nerves assuaged, I finally eat my room temperature Dunkin' Donuts bagel. I’m unsure, as I eat, if now is the moment to go home, or if I pursue more interviews. The monitor announces to the room that both auditions would be seeing non members. The energy climbs. This means that the monitor, at any time, could call your name. Since we’re in the Equity building, if an auditioner’s name is called, they take their things and go to the 16th floor, where they will wait to line up with the monitor there. The room isn’t crowded, and it’s still early. This is an excellent sign for these actors. For me, however, I know if I were to interview anyone else, there would be a chance mid-interview their name would be called & they would need to leave abruptly.

As I’m considering all different scenarios, I scan the room looking for a face comfortable enough to approach. In the corner, peering through stylishly smart glasses, I find it in a familiar expression. Tall, lean, & stylish, I see Christian. We did a play about a year ago together. He’s thoughtful, tender, & well read. A pleasant sight. We chat for a bit, and I ask if he would mind being interviewed. We retreat to the corner of the room, where we get a sense of a bit more privacy. In our own little corner, in our own little chair, we can be whatever we want to be, etc. etc.

Giuliana: So, if you want to state your name, and your pronouns.

Christian: My name is Christian Negron, I use he and they pronouns.

G: What time did you get up this morning?

C: I got up at 4am.

G: No!

C: I’m a commuter, I live in Long Island currently. So, with the commute, that’s the time that I woke up.

G: Sad.

C: Yup.

G: What number are you on the list?

C: I’m #13 on the non-equity list.

G: Very exciting. How long have you been auditioning?

C: Professionally, about two and a half years.

G: And what’s been the most surprising thing that you’ve found about the professional industry?

C: I think before I started professionally auditioning, I was very stressed out about the culture of how stressful and cutthroat this business is, which it is, definitely. But in my experience, I was really taken aback with how nice people are & the gathered community. It’s been really nice seeing people at different calls, and stuff like that.

G: Okay, how do you approach your craft as a performer?

C: I try to soak up as much information, knowledge as I can. Whether that’s reading new plays, or just any sort of literature. Seeing as many shows as I can, collaboration. I have a lot of friends that are writers & getting to read their work. Like a sponge, soaking up as much as I can. I feel like I can rely on the technique that I learned in school; I know the work is there.It’s about growing as I get older with the life experience that I have.

G: How do you approach auditions?

C: It depends. I do a lot of Shakespeare, so if I’m auditioning for a Shakespeare company, or a contemporary play or a musical, it varies. I like to prep as much as I can. I always like to have at least a couple monologues in my back pocket. I don’t like to prep for things last minute, sometimes you have to, but I don’t like to be super stressed in the holding room. So that I can just go in the room, and be present. Sleep as much as I can the night before. Hydration, coffee. And definitely also music, to calm me down.

G: Do you have a specific audition playlist?

C: I wouldn’t say it’s anything specific, just any music that makes me feel good, or relaxed. The band HAIM is one of my favorite bands. I’m always listening to them. They make me feel good.

G: When did you first decide, I want to be a ‘performer’?

C: Not to be super topical... but with the Wicked movie* coming out,

*The Wicked movie came out the day of this interview

I remember I was like, 9 years old, and I almost put on a super amateur production of Wicked, in like my basement. Like, I built props and set pieces out of cardboard, there was this whole thing. I would definitely say around that time, that was the first show, musical, that I fell in love with, that made me get into acting, and performing, and music. Musical theater was my gateway into performing.

G: The gateway drug.

C: Of course.

G: Okay, this is a two part question. What’s the best part of all of this, and the hardest part of all of this?

Chris takes a deep breath.

C: The best part of all this? You know, I remember someone, I think it was a professor of mine, telling me in school that, you know, as actors, we’re not going to be booked all of the time. & Auditioning is a chance to get to act. Having to remind myself in these moments that are super stressful, ‘No, I get to do the thing that I really love to do’, even if it’s just for a really short time. Reminding myself of that. And the hardest thing is, I mean, I would be remiss to mention that rejection is super hard, of course.

G: Yeah.

C: Having to constantly put yourself out there and the vulnerability of that is super hard for me, personally. You know, it’s something that ebbs and flows. Sometimes it’s easier and sometimes it’s harder. Having to keep showing up is really hard. But we do it anyway.

G: Yeah. We do the hard thing. One of my mentors in school said, ‘As an artist, sometimes it’s really hard to not wake up and feel like a failure’. I think that’s so true, what you’re saying. You just have to keep going, even when you feel like a failure, or there is all this rejection, because then you get to do the thing that you love. Which is sick..Who are you when you’re not working? Like, what do you love to do that has nothing to do with your career?

C: I’m a big... walker. That sounds very like, weird. But if I can walk anywhere, I will. People think I’m crazy when I walk 50 city blocks, or something like. I prefer to walk. I like to, I don’t know, be out in the world.

G: You said, The Subway Is Not For Me.

C: No, no. Also, like the subway is scary. If I can walk, I’ll walk. I definitely picked that up as a pandemic thing. I like to do it, especially to clear my head. I mean it’s related to entertaining but I’m a big music person. I play the guitar & the piano.I’m a big concert goer. Like, if there’s a big concert, trust, I’m going to buy a ticket.I love hearing live music. And recently traveling. I went out of the country for the first time this year, and I already have plans to do some more traveling.

G: Where’d you go, if you don’t mind me asking?

C: I went to London.

G: Okay, not to make this about me, I lived in London for four months. It was so amazing, highly highly recommend. Since you mentioned music, any favorite concerts that you have gone to as of late? Who’s your album of the year this year?

C: This year, I went to see Ryan Beatty. He’s this really amazing artist & he performed in Brooklyn in February. & it was this super intimate, amazing set. And it was one of the best live performances I’ve seen, ever. And also, brat, album of the year.

G: period. It’s a brat summer. A brat fall. A brautumn.

C: Yes.

G: Finally, do you have any website or social media you’d like to share with the class? Anything you’d like to promote as of the moment?

C: Yeah, my website is https://www.christiannegron.com/ & you can find me on Instagram @chrisanegron. And, I don’t know if anyone will be in Nebraska next March & April but I’m doing a play called The Night Larry Kramer Kissed Me in Omaha, Nebraska.

G: Thank you again, so much for your time.

It’s 9:32.

I pack my things up and leave, as the monitor picks up speed. Julia & Evan have been called up to dance, & Christian will be called up for their monologue soon. I take the elevator downstairs.

It’s 9:47.

I walk out of the Equity building, and the outside world feels a little less brutal than before.